Video: Introductions, Red Eye style

posted at 10:35 pm on September 25, 2007 by Allahpundit

I’ve never been more tempted to take Levy up on his kind offer to do a guest segment sometime. If only I didn’t have this hunchback and fear of bright lights and moving objects…

I’ll do one when Treacher does one.

Blowback

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Comments

Wow.

Why did I have to miss this episode?

Keljeck on September 25, 2007 at 10:42 PM

I love this show, It and Hume are all that is worth seeing.

Win Win Win on September 25, 2007 at 10:43 PM

dailygut says andy levy is gonna be on the whole show tonight! Is it true? Is it true?

lorien1973 on September 25, 2007 at 10:44 PM

love this show!

trailortrash on September 25, 2007 at 10:45 PM

If Allahpundit ever gets an I-phone and stops complaining that he doesn’t have one, then I would believe Ahmadinejad.

Mcguyver on September 25, 2007 at 10:45 PM

I hate to admit that I laughed out loud.

realVerse on September 25, 2007 at 10:48 PM

Gutfeld is always funny but this is hilarious

abinitioadinfinitum on September 25, 2007 at 10:48 PM

I’ll take one knapkin to go please,before it rains,
and I do it before i’m drunk.hahalol.

Oh Allahpundit,LMAO.

canopfor on September 25, 2007 at 10:48 PM

The Mike Baker intros were great on that show.

Bad Candy on September 25, 2007 at 10:50 PM

Andy’s going to special guest on the first block!

Srry lorien, only first block (he’s done a couple of those before).

Anyone else’s heart broken by Court’s fear of guns?

TheEJS on September 25, 2007 at 10:51 PM

If Allahpundit ever gets an I-phone and stops complaining that he doesn’t have one,

AP,
I will buy you an iPhone.

realVerse on September 25, 2007 at 10:52 PM

lolololololololol. Allah’s doing it for the lulz.

bigbeas on September 25, 2007 at 10:54 PM

Soooo funny!

Spirit of 1776 on September 25, 2007 at 10:57 PM

Hey why don’t you put up a video of the time (a couple weeks ago) when everyone (including Greg) was in pro-amnesty, pro-illegal agreement? Seeing as how nothing else gets you people going more, I’m curious what you thought while watching that.

Patriot33 on September 25, 2007 at 11:00 PM

ha! officially lost it at the bathroom soap dispenser line.

John from OPFOR on September 25, 2007 at 11:00 PM

Patriot33 on September 25, 2007 at 11:00 PM

Ssssshhhhhhhhh. Enjoy, goose frava.

‘sides don’t break the Guts stride, he works better thinking his 1/16th mexican.

TheEJS on September 25, 2007 at 11:02 PM

Someone hand me some windex and a napkin, My monitor is covered in Cherry Pepsi.

JayHaw Phrenzie on September 25, 2007 at 11:03 PM

If this humor were a stomach-ache, I’d projectile vomit across the street! (That means I liked it, too, I think.)

smellthecoffee on September 25, 2007 at 11:04 PM

Hey why don’t you put up a video of the time (a couple weeks ago) when everyone (including Greg) was in pro-amnesty, pro-illegal agreement?

Thought that was irritating. That him or Fox’s position on the issue?

Spirit of 1776 on September 25, 2007 at 11:06 PM

What time?

Jim Treacher on September 25, 2007 at 11:07 PM

I will buy you an iPhone.

If Ahmadinejad ever tells the truth, I-Phones will be free.

Mcguyver on September 25, 2007 at 11:10 PM

P.S. Gabrielle Tuite is a CGI creation. And I have my suspicions about Mike Baker.

Jim Treacher on September 25, 2007 at 11:11 PM

kevin godlington is my babydaddy.

its vintage duh on September 25, 2007 at 11:12 PM

Gabrielle Tuite is a CGI creation.

I suspected as much. Good lord.

Allahpundit on September 25, 2007 at 11:13 PM

If Ahmadinejad was Gucci, Donald Trump would have to wear a wig.

Mcguyver on September 25, 2007 at 11:15 PM

P.S. Gabrielle Tuite is a CGI creation. And I have my suspicions about Mike Baker.

Jim Treacher on September 25, 2007 at 11:11 PM

I woulda guessed Baker was a robot.

Bad Candy on September 25, 2007 at 11:16 PM

I can’t not stay up to see these nuts every night. Dam them.

Griz on September 25, 2007 at 11:21 PM

If the Jewish lesbian dKos diarist is satire, then Kermit the Frog is Ahmadinejad.

Mcguyver on September 25, 2007 at 11:25 PM

Sometimes I hate that I don’t start work till 11am, but then Red Eye comes on and it’s almost worth missing happy hour. Unless I’m eating chicken wings and drinking beer at the time, then- worth it.

Hollowpoint on September 25, 2007 at 11:25 PM

If this humor were a stomach-ache, I’d projectile vomit across the street! (That means I liked it, too, I think.)

smellthecoffee on September 25, 2007 at 11:04 PM

I was nauseated too, but, not for the same reason.

boomer on September 25, 2007 at 11:26 PM

Lol, I used the “pump him in the bathroom” one in a HotAir thread yesterday. By the way, did anyone else hear Gabrielle Tuite say “so would I!” after Gutfeld said it?

Anyway, here’s a few:

“If hosting ability was mouth wash, I’d have Gutfeld in the back of my throat at least once a day.”

“If grungy sidekicks were gas pumps, I’d let Bill put his hose in me and fill me up, whenever I feel empty inside”

“Rebeccas Gomez. If beauty was a Friday night, I’d go downtown and then get inside and go for a ride”

“Julie Banderas. If hotness was a rocking chair, I’d get on top of her and go back and forth until I fall asleep.”

Etc. etc.

RightWinged on September 25, 2007 at 11:30 PM

If Rosie O’Donnell is the #6 most influential pundit, then Kermit the frog is in hot water.

Mcguyver on September 25, 2007 at 11:30 PM

now thats just funny

Mojack420 on September 25, 2007 at 11:38 PM

RightWinged on September 25, 2007 at 11:30 PM

I liked yours better, actually. Maybe it was just lack of volume, though, I don’t know.

smellthecoffee on September 25, 2007 at 11:54 PM

You should definitely go on Allah, then you could post a YouTube of yourself on TV!

WisCon on September 25, 2007 at 11:56 PM

Could you imagine the comments on the HA thread about the intro Gutfeld would give to AP?

conservnut on September 26, 2007 at 12:12 AM

My only daily Tivo anymore…..
Only a confident heterosexual could wear a blouse with shoulder pads like that.

TBinSTL on September 26, 2007 at 12:16 AM

I liked yours better, actually. Maybe it was just lack of volume, though, I don’t know.

smellthecoffee on September 25, 2007 at 11:54 PM

Oh, and those were just rough off the top examples I came up with… I wish I could get paid to sit in a Fox News office writing those things, obviously more polished, for Gutfeld… another one for the road:

“Greg Gutfeld – If hosting abilities were lips, you could always find him between my cheeks!”

RightWinged on September 26, 2007 at 12:22 AM

This passes for funny. sigh.

/O cheer up, RB. You haven’t watched television in over seven years.

RushBaby on September 26, 2007 at 12:24 AM

I love Red Eye — it’s excellent!

D2Boston on September 26, 2007 at 12:38 AM

Al, I never seen that segment with Bryan. Are you aware it cuts off halfway through?

abinitioadinfinitum on September 26, 2007 at 12:51 AM

I woulda guessed Baker was a robot.

Bad Candy on September 25, 2007 at 11:16 PM

Close. The CIA removed his olfactory nerve. ;)

However, I like him.

Connie on September 26, 2007 at 12:54 AM

abinitioadinfinitum on September 26, 2007 at 12:51 AM

Try pausing and letting the entire thing load before you play it.

Connie on September 26, 2007 at 12:58 AM

I’ve watched Red Eye since the first night. Took a bit, but Greg has grown on me. Glimmers of true intelligence are found among the sex blather.

Connie on September 26, 2007 at 1:01 AM

The UK Special Ops soldier was so thrilled.

Christoph on September 26, 2007 at 2:09 AM

They’re kicking it tonight I’ll tell you.

Griz on September 26, 2007 at 2:11 AM

A little bird told me Allah was in his late 30′s, rather cute, single, but on the shy side.

kiakjones on September 26, 2007 at 6:33 AM

Ohhh, bogartin’ the hunchback schtick, eh?

heh

lauraw on September 26, 2007 at 7:07 AM

If they named a hotel after Rebecca Gomez, it would be called “Inn-credible.”

radjah shelduck on September 26, 2007 at 7:13 AM

“I’d pump him in the bathroom”

…dear God, I can’t take anymore funny. That much funny damn near hurts.

flyawaybird on September 26, 2007 at 7:31 AM

Hate to be Johnny Raincloud here, but isn’t this proof positive of the “death of the grown up”? Never seen the show, probably never will, now.

leavenedbread on September 26, 2007 at 7:36 AM

By the way, did anyone else hear Gabrielle Tuite say “so would I!” after Gutfeld said it?

I noticed that too! And I agree.

Rightwingsparkle on September 26, 2007 at 8:36 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGVMhC6ZUOA

Looks like Greg did it again on Monday night. RedEye is the best.

Complete7 on September 26, 2007 at 9:02 AM

SO much better than the half hour news hour. Looks like they’re adapting.

MadisonConservative on September 26, 2007 at 9:39 AM

That was hilarious! I love RedEye.

CP on September 26, 2007 at 10:07 AM

When is Greg and Red Eye going to have the “Little Hitler” and
“Hitlery” on? That is an introduction that will cause a full fledged self implosion of the left.

The amount of hatred the left would have to generate counter a simple introduction would cause a meltdown trying to develop an (ir)rational humorous comeback (impossible because the left has not sense of humor because humor relies on truth).

MSGTAS on September 26, 2007 at 10:21 AM

good stuff. I’ve never seen the show, but it looks like it would be worth watching for sure. It’s rare to find something actually funny on TV anymore.

ThackerAgency on September 26, 2007 at 10:25 AM

I noticed that too! And I agree.

Hell yeah. Who wouldn’t want to pop Mike Baker’s cork?

I consider sexual attraction to Mike Baker to be the new definition of patriotism.

Enrique on September 26, 2007 at 10:54 AM

Not only are these intros the most entertaining part of the show, they’re also excellent pick-up lines.

Blacklake on September 26, 2007 at 12:09 PM

A little bird told me Allah was in his late 30’s, rather cute, single, but on the shy side.

Well, you got single and shy right.

Allahpundit on September 26, 2007 at 12:11 PM

Hell yeah. Who wouldn’t want to pop Mike Baker’s cork?

I consider sexual attraction to Mike Baker to be the new definition of patriotism.

Enrique on September 26, 2007 at 10:54 AM

Heh. I’m not even American and yeah. Mike Baker is hot. Does that mean I’m an honorary American??

AP, I don’t believe you about the hunchback. I’ll bet that you’re the cutest guy in the comic book store.

mjk on September 26, 2007 at 12:35 PM

i hear that he has a bright red flakey patch of exema across the left side of his face, wears a cape and a bycicle helmet at all times, and acvtuall prefers the zune to the ipod.

jummy on September 26, 2007 at 12:37 PM

acttually, i think ap’s blog persona is so well established as cute and charming that he could go from female reader’s home to female reader’s home collecting as much tang as he can drink. providing he showed up in a decent outfit.

jummy on September 26, 2007 at 12:42 PM

Hate to be Johnny Raincloud here, but isn’t this proof positive of the “death of the grown up”? Never seen the show, probably never will, now.

leavenedbread on September 26, 2007 at 7:36 AM

Sounds like you ought to head over to (the alley behind) Fox headquarters and find a staffer to make note of your complaint. You’ll know you’ve find the right guy when you do because he’ll be the one dressed as a unicorn… with a hole in the back.

RightWinged on September 26, 2007 at 12:48 PM

I hate to admit that I laughed out loud.

realVerse on September 25, 2007 at 10:48 PM

As did I.

PRCalDude on September 26, 2007 at 12:51 PM

Not only are these intros the most entertaining part of the show, they’re also excellent pick-up lines.

Blacklake on September 26, 2007 at 12:09 PM

Heh.

PRCalDude on September 26, 2007 at 1:27 PM

A little bird told me Allah was in his late 30’s, rather cute, single, but on the shy side.

You just described 90% of the dudes here. Nice one, Sherlock. :)

Enrique on September 26, 2007 at 1:34 PM

Best Newscast on TV

Oxybeles on September 26, 2007 at 2:28 PM

not to go OT, but…

self-parodying progressive treacle of the day fron salon.com:

Dear Cary,

When I was 12 or so and living in Outer White Generica (aka the Tucson suburbs), a friend of mine taught me a racist little ditty. We were two sheltered Mormon white kids who had hardly ever even seen an African-American. We were sharing a naughty secret. We were, to quote Gene Wilder from the Mel Brooks movie “Blazing Saddles”: “You know … morons.” It is now almost 30 years later and that stupid little song has come back with a vengeance. I keep hearing it over and over in my head (“I don’ care what de’ white mon say…” I’ll leave it at that). Yesterday I caught myself mumbling the words as I sat at my cubicle working and almost had to “put on the brown pants” looking around to see if anyone was listening.

I’ve become so paranoid that I’m going to blow my proper, liberal, modern, progressive cover that I’m only making it worse. The more you try to not think about something, the worse it gets. My co-workers already think I’m a little strange (Asperger syndrome will do that) and my slightly panicked, furtive body language can’t be helping. Should I lock myself in a room and shout it out for two hours? What if I get caught? Help!

Dear Bad Ditty,

Say a man stands behind a counter of steam trays dishing out hot lasagna to folks who have no money and no home and nothing to eat. As he dishes out the food, a little racist ditty from his childhood is running through his head. If we could monitor the music that is playing in his head, would we take that spoon away from him and beat him with it and throw him out of the soup kitchen? Or would we let him ladle out soup to the poor? Until we have done the work that we are called to by our good fortune, who cares what racist ditties play in our heads? Until we in America have housed and fed and clothed the poor and homeless and provided everyone with decent medical care, who among us …

jummy on September 26, 2007 at 2:29 PM

I consider sexual attraction to Mike Baker to be the new definition of patriotism.

I’d meet at the door wrapped in a flag.

Rightwingsparkle on September 26, 2007 at 5:29 PM