Video: The media’s got a fee-vah and the only prescription is more rape
posted at 8:26 pm on September 4, 2007 by Allahpundit
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It’s like JonBenet, Laci Peterson, and a million Amber Alerts combined.
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How long before you’ve got to do it Allah? I’m guessing about half an hour.
RightWinged on September 4, 2007 at 8:35 PM
Do what?
Allahpundit on September 4, 2007 at 8:35 PM
That pretty much says it all right there in a nutshell for all to see, dwell upon and implant within our minds to never relinquish. Forever and again to stiffin’ one’s fortitude or wettin’ one’s appetite. Remember… for news, information and opinion. Theres only one true source… television news.
Griz on September 4, 2007 at 8:36 PM
and oh.. nice find AP.
Griz on September 4, 2007 at 8:38 PM
Funny, yet disturbing. It’s so true though, between the news coverage and the way Hollywood keeps churning out the rape/torture flicks it’s pretty sick. Once a month when I wander through Blockbuster trying in vain to find a decent movie, I’m amazed at the number of “Hot White Girls Tortured” movies. Not to mention Hot White Girls Get Tortured 2, HWGGT 3, and so on…. I’m also amazed at the sheer number of copies of each movie in this lovely genre.
reaganaut on September 4, 2007 at 8:41 PM
Heh, that and the Haiti clip pretty much sum up cable news.
Spirit of 1776 on September 4, 2007 at 8:41 PM
The Onion gets better and better. Did anyone click onto this after the first vid? After Craig, now Ingersoll!
laelaps on September 4, 2007 at 8:41 PM
Not one of their better clips.
Pam on September 4, 2007 at 8:41 PM
It’s from the Onion News Network. Take it with a grain of salt. No, make that a truckload of salt.
Bigfoot on September 4, 2007 at 8:43 PM
You know, what you always have to do.
RightWinged on September 4, 2007 at 8:46 PM
…Write a post about robots? Whine about not having an iPhone?
Allahpundit on September 4, 2007 at 8:48 PM
About Larry Craig reconsidering resigning ?
William Amos on September 4, 2007 at 9:06 PM
I vote … robots!
Jaibones on September 4, 2007 at 9:13 PM
The main story was pretty funny, but the headlines are the best part.
Mark V. on September 4, 2007 at 9:14 PM
RightWinged on September 4, 2007 at 8:46 PM
My “Spidey sense” detects a set-up coming up.
Sgt. Khe Sahn
1GooDDaDDy on September 4, 2007 at 9:19 PM
……..explain to some apoplectic poster that the Onion news is parody.
ConstantSorrow on September 4, 2007 at 9:21 PM
A post about robots raping iPhones, maybe?
Good Lt on September 4, 2007 at 9:22 PM
It’s a … wha?
Jaibones on September 4, 2007 at 9:22 PM
You people are terrible, laughing at the plight of that poor girl who is probably being brutally raped at this very moment! You all sicken me!
You mean like in response to something like that?
FloatingRock on September 4, 2007 at 9:23 PM
He means how long before you have to tell some posters on this blog that it’s not a real news story. I get the joke about the tendency of news media to overdo stories like this, but this topic was in bad taste – even for the onion.
thedecider on September 4, 2007 at 9:23 PM
I don’t know her disappearance, but Megan is hot…
Tim Burton on September 4, 2007 at 9:23 PM
Prayers up… that poor girl.
MT on September 4, 2007 at 9:28 PM
Sad…because it’s pretty accurate on how the media reacts. Until the ratings dip, and it’s *door slam* and on to the next human tradgedy…
JetBoy on September 4, 2007 at 9:29 PM
I’ve got a candle lit in my front yard, probably in memoriam. I’m going to keep it lit until sometime between now and two days from now.
marc@hubsandspokes on September 4, 2007 at 9:52 PM
That has to be the worst reporting ever! Even our media cannot have stuped to this new low. It has to be some kind of sick joke. (missing 2 days, no evidence, has been horribly raped???)
allrsn on September 4, 2007 at 9:53 PM
Reminds me of…
Reminds me of how Paula Zahn smiles when reading tragic news
Kini on September 4, 2007 at 9:53 PM
I guess it’s time for me to fulfull RightWinged’s prediction and formally notify everyone that this is an Onion parody, huh?
Allahpundit on September 4, 2007 at 9:54 PM
What ? I thought the Craig story was the onion one !
William Amos on September 4, 2007 at 9:57 PM
Heh. I wasn’t sure what RW was indicating. Heh, when are you people gonna learn to check if its an Onion link? Allah isn’t going to write a post title like that on a serious story.
Sad how accurate the bit is though.
Bad Candy on September 4, 2007 at 9:58 PM
Pretty funny that RW called it like that.
Bad Candy on September 4, 2007 at 9:59 PM
Come on! Surely you could have reeled in a few more fish–like our friend at 9:53 PM.
baldilocks on September 4, 2007 at 10:00 PM
Nope…
Bingo! I watched this and was thought, “oh crap”, knowing what sort of comments you might be in for.
RightWinged on September 4, 2007 at 10:01 PM
RightWinged on September 4, 2007 at 8:35 PM
Just under an hour. Not bad.
Of course, I realized this was a bogus news story. Everyone I know answered “Ron Paul” to their little survey, and they didn’t report that.
RushBaby on September 4, 2007 at 10:02 PM
The fact that the top of the video window reads ‘Onion News Network’ is a dead giveaway.
baldilocks on September 4, 2007 at 10:02 PM
That was funny!
Spirit of 1776 on September 4, 2007 at 10:10 PM
baldilocks on September 4, 2007 at 10:02 PM
Not to mention the logo (Onion NN)
RushBaby on September 4, 2007 at 10:11 PM
You’re funny. /sarcasm
MT on September 4, 2007 at 10:17 PM
I bought it hook , line and half the sinker before
it hit me as a parody. Sad part is, The media is not
that far from that this BS.
Some of it is already there.
Texyank on September 4, 2007 at 10:24 PM
I don’t get game till AP reminds us of the obvious.
After all, some of us are a product of the TV generation and can’t make the distinction between real life and fiction.
Closer to the truth than you may think.
Kini on September 4, 2007 at 10:29 PM
If it weren’t for the big ol’ ‘Onion’NN on the screen, I would have thought it was a Nancy Grace Story.
- The Cat
MirCat on September 4, 2007 at 10:41 PM
Those two-week long ordeals of searching for crushed coal-miners would get a lot higher ratings if more of the miners looked like little Megan.
pedestrian on September 4, 2007 at 10:42 PM
Totally tasteless. There is NOTHING funny about that. And yes, I can have a perverted sense of humor, but that was just offensive and too close to home.
mimi1220 on September 4, 2007 at 10:44 PM
It might not be funny if it was more than 2 degrees worse than the real coverage these cases get. But it wasn’t.
Kidnapping and rape-murder isn’t funny, and the salivating coverage news networks give to these high-profile missing persons cases isn’t funny. But ridiculing the infotainers for behaving so crassly in the light of real human tragedies can be. And this was.
Blacklake on September 4, 2007 at 11:01 PM
Totally agree Blacklake, if it wasn’t so damn accurate, it would absolutely be horrid, but it is.
Bad Candy on September 4, 2007 at 11:12 PM
Considering it’s skewering the MSM, I’m fairly pleased with it.
Social satire needs to bite, don’t you think?
Asher on September 4, 2007 at 11:28 PM
Was that Greta of ‘For the Record’?
CrazyFool on September 4, 2007 at 11:39 PM
There are other options.
My wife and I rent movies made in China, Thailand, Vietnam, Korea, India, and elsewhere, which offer fine stories, excellent acting, and a “choice” if you will.
We enjoyed such movies as the Chinese film “Eat, Drink, Man, Woman,” and the Bollywood family story “Kabe Kush, Kabe Gum,” featuring several of my favorite actors, including Sharuhk Kan, and Kajol, one of my favorite actresses.
There are so many titles to suggest, but I’ll just leave those two as examples.
Bottom line, we might have similar experiences regarding Hollywood movies. I find many of them gross and sadistic, negative, or, if you prefer, cynical.
Many of the Hollywood celebrities portray vile characters, yet these same Hollywood celebrities behave and speak as if they are Oracles, touched by the gods, lecturing us, the unwashed, violent, Neanderthal masses how to live, preaching to us about nonviolence and their hatred of war, all while they make millions performing as sadistic killers, war mongers, assassins, movie heroes, husbands who cheat on their wives, wives who cheat on their husbands, men who don’t care about how they treat women, and vise versa.
They get to use the microphone for the press, the media, echo what they say, these high priests of morality who don’t live the life, but preach it to us just the same.
Anyway, I can relate to your story regarding video rentals. I hate slasher films. It is amazing that there are so many of them in which pretty women and young people are terrorized, kidnapped, imprisoned, and tortured to death.
How sick is that?
What does that say about our society?
William
William2006 on September 4, 2007 at 11:40 PM
Once a fan of the Onion from way back, I didnt’ like this clip much.I found it debasing and disturbing, and really didn’t like how closely to the real media template it came.
OneEyedJack on September 5, 2007 at 12:04 AM
closely? i think i ain’t got no good english
OneEyedJack on September 5, 2007 at 12:05 AM
I don’t see what’s funny about rapes, abductions, and murders. The Onion really missed the mark on this one.
SoulGlo on September 5, 2007 at 1:14 AM
Let’s wake up!
spike on September 5, 2007 at 1:42 AM
Let I should explain: They are not making light/fun of rape. They are making fun of reporters and their reports. This goes right along with “Something happening in Haiti”(and I don’t mean the UFOs). Remember, the Onion made it’s mark by making fun of newspapers and news websites.
In case anyone missed it. Whenever the parents started talking positive, the reporter cut them off and cut to someone they hoped had something dramatic.
- The Cat
MirCat on September 5, 2007 at 2:02 AM
MirCat already explained it to you, but I’d add Geraldo as a specific example. I won’t mention him holding up black children and crying in NOLA while reporting all the total lies coming out of that city…. instead I’ll look more recently, to the Virginia Tech shootings.
Remember when bloggers dug up photos of an Asian kid who went there posing with a bunch of his guns? Well, it was quickly debunked as NOT the Virginia Tech shooter… Geraldo was hyping the hell out of it (hours after it was debunked), talking about how disturbing the images were… even though they weren’t at all.
It’s not “rape” that’s being mocked, it’s the way the reporters treat these “missing/raped” girl of the week stories. They don’t want the story to be “it turns out, she was just camping” or “the guy chickened out and dropped her back off a few hours later”.
RightWinged on September 5, 2007 at 4:28 AM
I love it. Parodies what the MSM does. They take assumptions and post them as facts.
SuperManGreenLantern on September 5, 2007 at 10:04 AM
Megan stopped by my house last night, had dinner with us, and said she was running away with the Maha Gehundi to a religious commune outside San Francisco.
The Gehundis (God bless you, here’s a kleenex) practice a form of cultism that attempts to establish the path between the jee and the wizzz that is necessary to be reborn as the highest life form on earth, the dung beetle. Their rituals are strange by Judaeo-Christian standards, involving activities with animals and virgins and saran wrap. I don’t know all the details. There might be an entry at http://www.wikipedia.com/Maha%20Gehundi with more information.
In the course of the meal, I asked her if the ONN story about her had any validity. She said, absolutely not. She was a willing participant in the animal sacrifices and that no virgins were involved. And as a result, no dungness was obtained. She said she hope that changes when she reaches Marin County.
She asked that I send a message to her parents telling that she’s all right, and that “vishnuyouverhere”.
Thankyouverymuch, I’ll be here till the end of the week.
georgej on September 5, 2007 at 11:25 AM
This video from The Onion is two hard swipes across the face of Greta Van Nosy. But it was also mocking the event, and that was too dark for me to appreciate. I like pitch black comedy just fine:
“The Loved One” with Robert Morse and Rod Steiger, “Heathers” in the 80’s. This post was funny, yes, but also a bit too dark, considering many families have had to go through similar events.
Doug on September 5, 2007 at 1:35 PM
This is not funny. Rape is no laughing matter.
jimbo2 on September 5, 2007 at 3:33 PM
Head
Hit
Keyboard
- Strongbad
MirCat on September 5, 2007 at 4:13 PM
Strong stuff, but I got the joke even if it made me cringe. Let’s face it, though–modern news media loves these kinds of grotesque stories. It’s about time someone mocked them for it.
R. Waher on September 5, 2007 at 11:08 PM
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