VRWC Memo: Silky PonyPink Sapphire Sweaty Pretzel to become Diesel Jockey

posted at 1:30 pm on August 29, 2007 by see-dubya

MEMO

FROM: VRWC HQ
TO: VRWC

Many of you have brought to our attention Sweaty Pretzel’s newest foray into nanny-state meddling, asking Americans to give up their SUVs. Delicious, in light of this item, detailing Sen. Edwards’ own love of big, man-sized, fuel-gargling trucks, even as he brags about using a hybrid SUV:

Edwards, happy to promote his energy-efficient Escape, also still owns a 2004 Chrysler Pacifica midsize SUV and a 1994 GMC truck, according to state vehicle registration records.

Campaign spokeswoman Kate Bedingfield said the Edwardses, who have two small children, use the Pacifica when they need more than two seat belts in the back, and the truck when they need to move furniture or haul something.

Well, I guess they don’t lack for garage space.

Minions, please adjust your rhetoric to reflect this change in sobriquet. The VRWC has spoken.

Yours conspiratorially,

(signed)

Zombie Reagan
VRWC Conspirator in Chief

P.S. By demanding that every bullet and tank in our supply chain be completely American-made, making them more expensive, does Diesel Jockey realize he’s either calling for a massive bump in defense expenditures–or a less-prepared military?

UPDATE: Those poor people Diesel Jockey loves so much are disappearing! Darn you, George Bush!

(Previously from VRWC HQ)

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Without objection.

amerpundit on August 29, 2007 at 1:34 PM

LAKE BUENA VISTA, Fla. (AP) — Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards told a labor group he would ask Americans to make a big sacrifice: their sport utility vehicles.

The former North Carolina senator told a forum by the International Association of Machinists and Aerospace Workers in Lake Buena Vista, Florida, yesterday he thinks Americans are willing to sacrifice.

Edwards says Americans should be asked to drive more fuel efficient vehicles. He says he would ask them to give up SUVs.

Edwards got a standing ovation when he said weapons and equipment used by America’s military needs to be made in the United States. He says tanks and ammunition for M16 rifles are being made in other countries.
He says jobs that provide equipment for America’s defense need to be made in the United States.

Huh? Tanks are produced in this country moron. As for .223 (5.56) other countries are helping to produce it due to great demand. Something about a war on terror if I recall correctly.

Andy in Agoura Hills on August 29, 2007 at 1:37 PM

1994 GMC truck

I’ll bet he says he doesn’t drive it but on his property. A typical excuse.

Andy in Agoura Hills on August 29, 2007 at 1:38 PM

BJ mckay and his best friend bear!

lorien1973 on August 29, 2007 at 1:39 PM

Edwards was asked during his appearance how he explained the contradiction of asking Americans to sacrifice while he’s living in a 28,000-square-foot (2,600-square-meter) mansion.

He said he came from nothing, worked hard all his life, has always supported workers and fought big corporations as a lawyer.

“I have no apologies whatsoever for what I’ve done with my life,” he said to loud cheers. “My entire life has been about the same cause, which is making sure wherever you come from, whatever your family is, whatever the color of your skin, you get a real chance to do something great in this country.”

JiangxiDad on August 29, 2007 at 1:40 PM

Well, our Strykers and LAV’s are produced in Canada by GM. (Canada may a swell be America, tho)

But, as usual, eddie munster is running off at the mouth about something he really knows nothing about.

Mazztek on August 29, 2007 at 1:41 PM

Campaign spokeswoman Kate Bedingfield said the Edwardses, who have two small children, use the Pacifica when they need more than two seat belts in the back, and the truck when they need to move furniture or haul something.

What the hell does he think everyone else is using them for?

amerpundit on August 29, 2007 at 1:41 PM

Tasty post indeed, See-Dubya.

*sigh*

I am counting the months until after the next President is elected, whoever it is, and this whole ridiculous Man-Made Global Warming idiocy fades out of fashion.

RushBaby on August 29, 2007 at 1:42 PM

Well, It won’t be long till Hillary gets the nomination and he’ll be a footnote in history.
Meanwhile, lets all sit back and watch the primaries come unglued!

Kini on August 29, 2007 at 1:44 PM

Well, It won’t be long till Hillary gets the nomination and he’ll be a footnote in history her VP.

Kini on August 29, 2007 at 1:44 PM

fixed

JiangxiDad on August 29, 2007 at 1:53 PM

Something about a war on terror if I recall correctly.

No, that’s just a cheap slogan. /sarc

Bigfoot on August 29, 2007 at 1:56 PM

Huh?

Silky Pony making news?

On a side note… I have decided to style my hair after Silky… Seriously.

It’ll cover up my high forehead and thus give me the look of “caveman” aka: Brad Pitt…

Kinda need the attention if you know what I mean.

AP, take note here.

Mcguyver on August 29, 2007 at 2:00 PM

Campaign spokeswoman Kate Bedingfield said the Edwardses, who have two small children, use the Pacifica when they need more than two seat belts in the back, and the truck when they need to move furniture or haul something.

This has got to be the most insane PR spin of the season- and that takes some doing! Are we supposed to give up OUR ability to haul more than two in the backseat? Are we supposed to give up OUR abilty to haul stuff but give a multi-millionaire a pass on making the very same sacrifices he is damanding of us?

This man’s hypocrisy knows no limits.

highhopes on August 29, 2007 at 2:01 PM

The war on SUV’s is silly. An SUV is a large car with more seat belts. The math is simple:

- GM’s Tahoe and Yucon can seat 8 and can post 20 GPM on flat interstate driving. That’s 160 miles per gallon (for a total of 8 persons).

- Typical family sedan can seat 5 and can post 30 GPM on flat intersate driving. That’s 150 miles per gallon (for a total of 5 persons).

End result is that SUVs in many instances can have better per passenger fuel efficiency than sedans.

Also, if you want to wage war on a vehicle, go after single cab pick-up trucks. Maximum of 3 passengers at 20 GPM is 60 miles per gallon.

Simple statistics.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 2:06 PM

Yes, master. By Your Leave…Wait a minute, he’s not Silky any more. I guess I didn’t get the memo. What’s up with that? Also, I’ve been burying Ron Paul articles on Digg all month long. When do I get my check.

BohicaTwentyTwo on August 29, 2007 at 2:06 PM

What a shmuck. I can’t believe he has any followers. He is clearly nothing more than a pandering putz.

Some people are soooooo stupid. I’d like to see some of his courtroom video. Imagine what the jurys must have looked like. Did he run mid-day ads as an ambulace chaser?

saiga on August 29, 2007 at 2:12 PM

What the hell does he think everyone else is using them for?

amerpundit on August 29, 2007 at 1:41 PM

Ha! Precisely what I was thinking. He apparently thinks we don’t really need them as much has he really needs them.

What a hypocrite.

Zetterson on August 29, 2007 at 2:13 PM

As much as it pains me to defend the Silky One, a Chrysler Pacifica is a car-based “crossover” vehicle that gets better gas mileage than a truck-based SUV (a Chevy Tahoe, for example).

The real hypocrisy is that he owns a gas-guzzling pickup truck built to 1994 emissions standards. (Everyone complains about SUV drivers who never leave the paved roads, but how many pickup drivers do the same?)

Damian P. on August 29, 2007 at 2:15 PM

Though you may consider the Pacifica an SUV, it’s more of a big sedan or a small minivan. I don’t believe it is 4×4 which is the minimum requirement for an SUV (in my estimation). Weak tea.

He’s still a douchebag.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 2:18 PM

Damian P. on August 29, 2007 at 2:15 PM

Oooppps, what he said.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 2:20 PM

What? You mean he’s STILL out there running? I thought he dropped out weeks ago!

pilamaye on August 29, 2007 at 2:22 PM

Sorry natesnake, your use of simple math is meaningless junk.

‘Pretzel math’ perhaps? A ludicrous attempt to contort some data to support a nonsensical point?

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 2:28 PM

The former North Carolina senator told a forum by the International Association of Machinists and Aerospace Workers in Lake Buena Vista, Florida, yesterday he thinks Americans are willing to sacrifice.

He may be right! I’m willing to sacrifice Silky Donkey Diesel on the altar of algore’s Church of the Hot Tomorrow any old time! Who knows, maybe the god manbearpig will be satisfied with our carbon offering and/or a 1994 GMC pickup and turn the sun down a tad?

Doggone it! We’re Americans, we HAVE to at least try!

kjspeedial on August 29, 2007 at 2:32 PM

Sorry natesnake, your use of simple math is meaningless junk.

‘Pretzel math’ perhaps? A ludicrous attempt to contort some data to support a nonsensical point?

I’m sorry Ochlan, but you’re obviously not good at efficiency ratios.

Why do you think liberals promote mass transit? It’s the same concept in a smaller vehicle.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 2:32 PM

Why do you think liberals promote mass transit?

Population control. Expanded government. Dependency. Unions.

Efficiency? Don’t make me lol

The math is shabby. The efficiency of a vehicle declines with load. Passengers vary in size. What your math attempts, badly, to demonstrate is _work_ not efficiency. You are still burning fuel. The math says one thing, your claim says another.

I should have said “meaningful” earlier…not “meaningless.

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 2:43 PM

*_not_ meaningful

(one of those days)

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 2:58 PM

Ochlan, go to http://www.fueleconomy.gov The numbers are all there.

2007 Honda Accord 21 city 25 average 31 interstate (5 passengers)
2007 Chevy Tahoe 14 city 17 average 20 interstate (8 passengers)
2007 Ford F150 13 city 15 average 18 interstate (3 passengers)

The Tahoe can transport more people on a gallon of fuel than the Accord. I happen to have a Tahoe and have clocked 19-20 MPG with a full vehicle on road trips.

Your observation is “meaningful junk”.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 3:00 PM

I think Nature Boy’s hair conditioner is starting to affect his brain; the only tank in the U.S. arsenal is the M1 Abrams, which is made in Lima, Ohio. Other common tracked armored vehicles are the Bradley and the M113, which are also made in the U.S. This pathetic slip-and-fall lawyer knows just about as much as you would expect. Dumbass.

Travis Bickle on August 29, 2007 at 3:01 PM

The point is that people focus on the wrong statistics. Sure it is wasteful and not efficient to drive an empty SUV, but there are people in the world who get very good use out of their big vehicle.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 3:05 PM

2007 Ford Freestar Minivan 15 city 17 average 21 interstate (7 passengers)

Screw the SUVs, shut down the minivans!

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 3:11 PM

Gee, somehow I manage to drive four high school football players, and their equipment, to and from practice in a Honda Civic.

dm60462 on August 29, 2007 at 3:18 PM

“I have no apologies whatsoever for what I’ve done with my life,”
Liar! Someone should point out to former Sen. John Edwards he has apologized for his 2002 vote to authorize the war

clghitis on August 29, 2007 at 3:19 PM

Gee, somehow I manage to drive four high school football players, and their equipment, to and from practice in a Honda Civic.

Gee, you want a medal or something?

What if you needed to transport 7 high school football players and their equipment? Two trips perhaps?

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 3:21 PM

No self-respecting man is named ‘bj’.

Silky!

locomotivebreath1901 on August 29, 2007 at 3:24 PM

I wish someone would ask him just when was the last time he and Elizabeth moved any furniture. I use my SUV, whose steeringwheel they will have to pry from my cold, dead hands, to haul 2 dogs, one man, two baby seats, myself, groceries, bags of topsoil, and yes, furniture. I can get 7 people in it, and often do.

His hairspray probably does more harm to the environment than my SUV.
Leave me alone, Silky Pony, Breck Girl, or Whoever you are!

Qzsusy on August 29, 2007 at 3:31 PM

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 3:00 PM

Your statistics are based on the assumption that the vehicle is always fully loaded. I can’t remember the last time I saw a fully loaded SUV. Seems like all the SUVs I see are occupied by a single driver. Usually some woman with a cell phone yakking away. Not that there is anything wrong with that. :)

Guardian on August 29, 2007 at 3:36 PM

We had a Honda Civic for 12 years. Good reliable car. Good mileage. Lousy ventilation system and lousy seats. After a trip to Florida during which I felt every pebble on the road, I have had back problems which I blame on that car. I can ride forever in my SUV with no pain. And I plan to.

Qzsusy on August 29, 2007 at 3:38 PM

Someone should point out to former Sen. John Edwards he has apologized for his 2002 vote to authorize the war

clghitis on August 29, 2007 at 3:19 PM

Oops. Not so fast there.
He changed his mind, again.

Mcguyver on August 29, 2007 at 3:38 PM

I don’t dispute the numbers, they seem reasonable. What I am disputing is your (or whoever fed you this waffle) mathematical misuse of them.

The Tahoe transports a greater number of people a shorter distance than the Accord per gallon of fuel. The product of your math is “people-miles” per gallon. Just because the word “miles” still appears on one side of the word “per” and “gallon” on t’other, does not mean you can still use the resulting numbers in the same sense as fuel efficiency. To do so is a confidence trick. Not unheard of in gubmint circles btw.

I could say that the Accord does 150% mileage (vs the Tahoe) with 62.5% of the passengers. What does that tell you?

You’re muddling together figures and not telling the real story…hence _not meaningful_. (got it right this time)

“Fuel efficiency” is not the same as “work done”

Most egregiously, you’re omitting the larger economic context of all this…you may be doing greater work, but at what cost? Assuming $2 per gallon, the costs for the Tahoe vs Accord are (respectively) 10c/mile vs 6c/mile

Also, the real-world clincher is the fact that you are making the fatal assumption that these vehicles always operate at full load. The reason this is ‘fatal’ is because the proponents of ‘mass’ transit rarely consider that it is not necessarily economically optimal

The full picture, required to make good decisions on what to use as transport, requires much broader economic analysis than some superficial multiplication.

But the gubmint, and relevant special interests, doesn’t expect that you are aware of this…

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 3:40 PM

I predict that before the Primaries are over Edwards will wear in public a Tshirt with Silky Pony on the front.

And that’s excluding the terms use publicly.

Speakup on August 29, 2007 at 3:45 PM

btw…the “cents per mile” comparison translates to 1.25 cents per “human-mile” and 1.2 cents per “human-mile”, respectively…big savings huh?

Now I’m playing mathematical con tricks too…

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 3:57 PM

ps. In all the above nonsense, the use of “passengers” is drivel too, as it is an abstraction. 8 midgets vs 8 linebackers makes a wee bit of a difference. The real calculation for work or efficiency involves understanding _mass_ being hauled around.

My ’79 silverado gets 9mpg, belches smoke, and I love it…full disclosure’n'all ;-)

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 4:03 PM

Screw the SUVs, shut down the minivans!

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 3:11 PM

That’s actually a great point, minivans aren’t on the hit list because if they were 3/4s of American libs would collectively flip them off.

That would be like Al Gore holding a presser to announce that domestic cats are the worst ecological disaster for wildlife ever brought to the western hemisphere.

It might be true but he would be beaten within an inch of his life before he could reach the door.

Speakup on August 29, 2007 at 4:09 PM

I was under the impression that The Pony’s own staff drive big, SUV’s. I can not verify this though, because his driveway appears to be about 28 miles long. But I will be happy to do my duty as a mere commoner in this country and strap my teenage sons into the back of Prius, if it will allow the Pony the right to guzzle some gas.

bloggless on August 29, 2007 at 4:10 PM

before he could reach claw and scratch his way to the door.

Speakup on August 29, 2007 at 4:10 PM

All fuzzy-math aside:

My ‘79 silverado gets 9mpg, belches smoke, and I love it…full disclosure’n’all ;-)

I dig your ride.

natesnake on August 29, 2007 at 4:31 PM

I dig your ride

A tip o’the hat backatcha, sir

It’s jacked up like a redneck on meth too lol

(me bein’ that redneck…without the meth)

Ochlan on August 29, 2007 at 4:36 PM

“My entire life has been about the same cause, which is making sure wherever you come from, whatever your family is, whatever the color of your skin, you get a real chance to do something great in this country chase ambulances and sue the beejesus out of major corporations.”

Fixed it for ya giddyup.

fogw on August 29, 2007 at 5:20 PM

You fail to understand.

They are better people than you…that’s why the rules don’t apply.

Asher on August 29, 2007 at 5:58 PM

Silky better keep up with those registrations on his SUV’s or else Sheriff Lobo will chase him all over the country!

mojowire on August 29, 2007 at 6:05 PM