Video: Celebrated nitwit already getting gigs

posted at 5:13 pm on August 29, 2007 by Allahpundit

I bet most people who knew her growing up thought she’d only ever be famous for being hot. Look how far she’s come. Nice pervy job by People here too cropping the shot to create the impression of nudity. You magnificent bastards.

Anyone seen or heard from the woman who actually won the pageant, incidentally? Click the image to watch.

upton.jpg

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Ah well its OK I still cant figure out how ROSIE ever got to be star

Certianly wasnt either looks or talent

William Amos on August 29, 2007 at 5:17 PM

Bwahaaha. She’s so proud of herself as she reads out the answers. She even threw in a “duh”. Can’t. Stop. Laughing.

Guardian on August 29, 2007 at 5:17 PM

I knew you’d come through with this!

Indeed, this idiot is now famous for her idiocy… while no one has a clue who the actual winner was. I also noticed the attempt to make her look naked, and noticed that she’s probably too dumb to get it… or doesn’t care, because she’s too dumb to recognize how pathetic it makes her look.

Anyway, folks, stick with it ’til the end, and tell me if she just had “stage fright” at the pageant, or if she’s truly a bonehead.

RightWinged on August 29, 2007 at 5:18 PM

I’m willing to overlook her lack of geographic smarts…

spec_ops_mateo on August 29, 2007 at 5:20 PM

Q: Would you like to be known as a dunce?

A: Depends on how much it pays.

jaime on August 29, 2007 at 5:22 PM

My message to her.

terryannonline on August 29, 2007 at 5:23 PM

RightWinged on August 29, 2007 at 5:18 PM

Oh there is no doubt she’s a bonehead. She’s a bonehead with an incredible future if she doesn’t end up falling off the Spears-Lohan cliff. She can read a script and look nice. What more does she need to make it big in Hollyweird?

Guardian on August 29, 2007 at 5:26 PM

I think the Right Shirts Done Right girls are smarter and I haven’t even heard them talk, prettier too.

Speakup on August 29, 2007 at 5:28 PM

The other day she was on the Today show.

Matt Lauer is such a simpering sycophant. I thought he was gonna bend over and start licking her toes right on the spot.

Mindcrime on August 29, 2007 at 5:35 PM

terryannonline on August 29, 2007 at 5:23 PM

Your hair shines like the sparkle of a snowflake on a sunny winter morning. Stunning!

Zetterson on August 29, 2007 at 5:39 PM

The quiz was actually quite tough (5/7). Her quick fact after question number 5 settles the bonehead or not question.

At least she can laugh at herself.

For those looking to waste even more time today here’s a nice Bionics Test based on the upcomming Bionic Woman Series:
http://www.bat-test.com/

12thman on August 29, 2007 at 5:39 PM

Lord.

I took the entire quiz and the poor thing stumbled when reading a few of the answers.

Who cares though. She’s a cutie and is getting her 15 minutes of fame, even if she has to expose herself as a dimwit.

Bigger careers have been made on less than that.

BacaDog on August 29, 2007 at 5:40 PM

Well, I took her quiz while I was perving on People‘s almost-nudity. 5/7. And yeah, she’s dumb as a bag of hammers.

I haven’t seen Miss Teen USA anywhere myself. And I’d like to.

ReubenJCogburn on August 29, 2007 at 5:44 PM

Hey, it worked for William Hung.

Asher on August 29, 2007 at 5:52 PM

I’d rather watch her read the news than Katie Couric.

Labamigo on August 29, 2007 at 5:57 PM

I liked Miss West Carolina‘s response.

jdpaz on August 29, 2007 at 5:58 PM

She looks so….vacant. Almost lobotomized.

But she can read a Teleprompter, anyway.

Hello, ABC, CBS, NBC?

Your next Nightly News Anchor In Training is ready!

cheers

eon

eon on August 29, 2007 at 6:00 PM

Her question: What is the driest place on earth?

Answer: Her brain, because apparently there hasn’t been any blood in there for several years.

Not that it really matters. =]

Lone Star on August 29, 2007 at 6:00 PM

I personally believe she has her own iPhone though.

Wade on August 29, 2007 at 6:04 PM

I’d rather watch her read the news than Katie Couric.

Labamigo on August 29, 2007 at 5:57 PM

Heh.

Jaibones on August 29, 2007 at 6:05 PM

I liked Miss West Carolina’s response.

jdpaz on August 29, 2007 at 5:58 PM

Okay, now that was just cruel…

Jaibones on August 29, 2007 at 6:05 PM

I don’t get the whole “she’s so hot” thing. She’s a cute blond girl who will be a dumpy brown haired lady when she turns 19.

And she’s harmless, but very, very impressionable (dumb) right now, and someone should be guiding her. Hell, AP, even an atheist can see why a church would do her a lot of good, right?

Jaibones on August 29, 2007 at 6:07 PM

I personally believe she has her own iPhone though.

Wade on August 29, 2007 at 6:04 PM

A very low blow sir.
Very low indeed.

billy on August 29, 2007 at 6:08 PM

Being a Scottish, she sure lives up to the stereo-type of being a Southern Belle.

Tim Burton on August 29, 2007 at 6:12 PM

The roadmap to fame: Maps? -we don’t need no stinkin’ maps!

When does she tour Iraq and South Africa?

They’re contiguous, right?

(Cute trumps all.)

profitsbeard on August 29, 2007 at 6:12 PM

Celebrated nitwit

Perfect.

MT on August 29, 2007 at 6:14 PM

Matt Lauer is such a simpering sycophant. I thought he was gonna bend over and start licking her toes right on the spot.

Mindcrime on August 29, 2007 at 5:35 PM

I was thinking of doing the same thing! Toes/Thighs…Whatever…Close enough on the Anatomy Map.

Tim Burton on August 29, 2007 at 6:14 PM

She’ll be darn lucky to get a weathergirl gig

BobH on August 29, 2007 at 6:15 PM

I am just waiting for the nudes.

Rode Werk on August 29, 2007 at 6:15 PM

Rode Werk-

I’m just waiting for the nudes.

Set your stopwatch.

profitsbeard on August 29, 2007 at 6:18 PM

Promises in Malibu already has reserved the inevitable spot for this one.

JammieWearingFool on August 29, 2007 at 6:21 PM

And she’s going to attend my alma mater. Heads need to roll in the admissions department of Appalachian State.

Frank Nitti on August 29, 2007 at 6:22 PM

Lauer couldn’t take his eyes off of her. Snicker.

pat on August 29, 2007 at 6:24 PM

She will make a good ‘Trophy wife’.

Helloyawl on August 29, 2007 at 6:25 PM

I am just waiting for the nudes.

Rode Werk on August 29, 2007 at 6:15 PM

It may be soon. I understand Donald Trump cut his European vacation short once he saw the video. So apparently he agrees with you.

Lone Star on August 29, 2007 at 6:29 PM

I really think she did a great job. At least her earrings aren’t hanging from her eyelids.

Lone Star on August 29, 2007 at 6:36 PM

Krykeee. Only in America. People magazine = a source. God save the Republic.

HA!

locomotivebreath1901 on August 29, 2007 at 6:40 PM

Lone Star-

At least her earrings aren’t hanging from her eyelids.

They’re supposed to be nose-rings.

profitsbeard on August 29, 2007 at 6:41 PM

Personally…I believe…that the education system should have helped people to take this test, because Africa and Iraq have education systems that help people and our education system should help people.

=]

Lone Star on August 29, 2007 at 6:43 PM

…such as.

jdpaz on August 29, 2007 at 7:09 PM

She uses George Bush’s speaking coach!

Kini on August 29, 2007 at 7:35 PM

At this point, I’m sure she’s enjoying the fame. Might as well roll with it and be willing to laugh at yourself.

brak on August 29, 2007 at 7:42 PM

i have zero problem with this.

I personally believe, that US Americans…is the land of opportunities, and stuff, and like if the Iraq future can be made, um, to be like the Asian countries and such, then Miss Thing can cash in on her famey, or infamy as the cases may be for maps and stuff.

Mike D. on August 29, 2007 at 8:03 PM

ps – from now until who-knows-when, i will preface everything i say with the words, “I personally believe that US Americans”, and i will conclude everything i say with the words “I have a wide stance.”

Mike D. on August 29, 2007 at 8:04 PM

Anyone seen or heard from the woman who actually won the pageant, incidentally?

You mean the one with some intelligence and talent in addition to beauty?

Nah, people don’t have any time for that.

It gets in the way.

Christoph on August 29, 2007 at 8:05 PM

In America, 15 minutes of fame can be parlayed into a career if you are female, young and sexy. Have any of you wondered if she may in fact, be the smartest, most clever person bimbo in the US?

We all know that for a young beauty to achieve fame and fortune, all she needs is to get noticed, kind of like Pam Anderson at that ball game. There are 5 million girls just like her in the US, but none of them will ever be famous. Because they didn’t get noticed. Well, she got noticed. The fact that it was for being vacuous is irrelevant to the end result.

I would like to think that she did the valley girl thing on cue. If I was her, that is exactly what I would have done. If she plays her cards right, and she has the stomach for the exploitation of the industry, this could propel her to fame and fortune.

jihadwatcher on August 29, 2007 at 8:05 PM

And yeah, she’s dumb as a bag of hammers.

ReubenJCogburn on August 29, 2007 at 5:44 PM

I think you just insulted a bag of hammers.

Kowboy on August 29, 2007 at 8:11 PM

I liked Miss West Carolina’s response.

Excuse me while I go get my map and find where West Carolina is.

Bigfoot on August 29, 2007 at 8:16 PM

I enjoyed that.

Metro on August 29, 2007 at 8:17 PM

Oh, dear Mohammad (I’ve decided to start being multicultural and using the name of other people’s deity’s in vain, too – sorry).

Where was I?

Oh. Right. Oh, dear L. Ron Hubbard! That girl is just stewpid.

She actually didn’t seem any less stooopid reading this prepared script. And that voice? It’s like a penguin farting. Or actually how I imagine it sounds when a penguin farts. Like an annoying trombone that needs tuning.

This is the girl that Anna Nicole Smith (may implants be upon her) and Pamela Anderson could tell blond jokes about.

Dear sweet Krishna. The humanity. Oh – the humanity.

Professor Blather on August 29, 2007 at 8:51 PM

jihadwatcher on August 29, 2007 at 8:05 PM

See:

jaime on August 29, 2007 at 5:22 PM

jaime on August 29, 2007 at 9:42 PM

She hot.

‘Nuff said.

Welcome to the real world of Men.

Sorry.

It’s true.

Montana on August 29, 2007 at 9:43 PM

I believe the technical term is “celebutard.”

Blacklake on August 29, 2007 at 9:58 PM

Two words:

Such as, therefore.

realVerse on August 29, 2007 at 10:14 PM

God I love America!

liberator9 on August 29, 2007 at 10:50 PM

I say she should be a model for “thoseshirts.com”. Perfect.

Mojave Mark on August 30, 2007 at 12:01 AM

I personally believe she has her own iPhone though.

Wade on August 29, 2007 at 6:04 PM

Bwahahaha

Darth Executor on August 30, 2007 at 9:45 AM

Mindcrime, you committed another mindcrime with that Matt Lauer toe licking reference-GET OUT OF MY HEAD! NOW!

Doug on August 30, 2007 at 10:07 AM

I say she should be a model for “thoseshirts.com”. Perfect.

Mojave Mark on August 30, 2007 at 12:01 AM

Heh. We have a career path!

Jaibones on August 30, 2007 at 10:22 AM

Oh, and I followed the link to discover that the Brain Surgeons at People Magazine have termed her coming out party as “a geography gaffe”, as if she said Turkmenistan instead of Waziristan.

They were probably stumped the first time they watched it, wondering “which part was wrong?”

Jaibones on August 30, 2007 at 10:25 AM

Oh, dear Mohammad (I’ve decided to start being multicultural and using the name of other people’s deity’s in vain, too – sorry).

Technically, Mohammad is not their deity, but their prophet. But I can see your point. The muslim reaction won’t be all that much different.

Years ago, a friend of mine from SE Asia used “Jesus Christ” as an interjection a few times. So I got back at him by using “Siddharta Gotama” (sp?) in the same way.

Bigfoot on August 30, 2007 at 10:40 AM

I think she’s pretty funny. AND HOT TOO!! Duh.

Antartica…pretty cold…brrrr…

lol

tlynch001 on August 30, 2007 at 12:48 PM

looking at her after her “gaffe” (such an inaccurate depiction by people) is difficult, but listen to her? no way…took my quiz w/o playing the videos, thankyouverymuch. 6/7.

Miss_Anthrope on August 30, 2007 at 1:51 PM

I guess that blacks will now demand to be called “African-US-Americans”?

Such as.

OhEssYouCowboys on August 30, 2007 at 3:27 PM

Hey, a hot blonde without brain one in her pretty little head?

We’re talkin’ STAR MATERIAL here, folks.

mojo on August 30, 2007 at 3:55 PM

Totally committed to the fifty bucks, as Frank Zappa would say…

LagunaDave on August 30, 2007 at 6:07 PM

I wouldn’t mind giving her diction lessons.

Either in Iraq or South Africa.

Whichever comes first.

profitsbeard on August 30, 2007 at 8:55 PM