Rumor: Gonzales out, Chertoff in as AG?

posted at 11:00 pm on August 26, 2007 by Bryan

Washington whispers.

The buzz among top Bushies is that beleaguered Attorney General Alberto Gonzales finally plans to depart and will be replaced by Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff. Why Chertoff? Officials say he’s got fans on Capitol Hill, is untouched by the Justice prosecutor scandal…

And so forth.

When I suggested a job change for Chertoff a while back, taking over Gonzales’s slot wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.

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Any chance Tancredo can become AG ? Simply to inform immigration ?

If not then will settle for Theodore Olson

William Amos on August 26, 2007 at 11:03 PM

That should be ENFORCE not inform but it is the Bush admin

William Amos on August 26, 2007 at 11:04 PM

I don’t believe this garbage anymore

Defector01 on August 26, 2007 at 11:05 PM

The man is untouched by the reality of the constituents he is sworn to protect.

bbz123 on August 26, 2007 at 11:06 PM

“Believe half of what you read and none of what you hear.”

Jaibones on August 26, 2007 at 11:07 PM

The best Chertoff could get is a quiet retirement. To be held in contempt for all the immigration and other fiascos, and his snooty attitude w/b more deserved.

Entelechy on August 26, 2007 at 11:11 PM

Lettuce-head as AG?

Oh my god.

Vyce on August 26, 2007 at 11:13 PM

If not then will settle for Theodore Olson

William Amos on August 26, 2007 at 11:03 PM

He’s too busy working on the Guiliani campaign.

billy on August 26, 2007 at 11:15 PM

Bah, they both suck…

Tim Burton on August 26, 2007 at 11:25 PM

Getting a little irked here that my comments aren’t posting…

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:27 PM

One of two words is being filtered: e-u-n-u-c-h *or* v-i-a-g-r-a…

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:32 PM

eunuch

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:32 PM

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:32 PM

It was the latter. WTF???

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:34 PM

I was walking down Constitution on Friday and happened to walk past the DOJ on my way to a Metro station. There were 3 (count em THREE) protesters complete with signs and a bullhorn yelling outside the door, calling for Gonzales’ resignation and saying he should be ashamed. I didn’t read the signs, since it looked more like a treatise, but I thought the tiny protest was rather…pathetic.

That said, I’m not a fan of his at all and even less so of Chertie. But since this administration’s already tanked, I don’t see how playing musical presidential appointees could screw the party any more. I wish we still had the Gipper.

wherestherum on August 26, 2007 at 11:35 PM

I call BS when I can’t insult Chertoff with a comment that involves the futility of eunuchs and v-i-a-g-r-a.

F*ck it.

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:43 PM

*Rams forehead into desk*

Theworldisnotenough on August 26, 2007 at 11:51 PM

Michael Chertoff? Is that the best they can do? I think they would be better off sticking with that lying Umpa Lumpa.

SoulGlo on August 26, 2007 at 11:57 PM

I nominate the Inanimate Carbon Rod

Asher on August 26, 2007 at 11:57 PM

Please not!!

jeanie on August 26, 2007 at 11:59 PM

Great. That’s just what we need if it’s more truth than rumor. An impotent limp-dick power hungry Momma’s boy who couldn’t run Homeland Security any better than he could run Wal-Mart Security playing U.S. Attorney General spitting the word ‘bigot’ into the camera lens every chance he gets at the people who ACTUALLY STAND FOR enforcing our country’s laws.

Oh yeah… my confidence in the chimperor EL Presidente’ Jorge Boosh is sky rocketing!

January 2009… please hurry.

SilverStar830 on August 27, 2007 at 12:09 AM

Asher on August 26, 2007 at 11:57 PM

Seconded.

yo on August 27, 2007 at 12:11 AM

Good Lord.

I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t wait for the 08 election so all of these clowns will be gone.

What the hell is going on with our gov’t? Are we doomed to keep getting people like Chertoff and Gonzales because nobody with any sense would ever consider serving these days?

BacaDog on August 27, 2007 at 12:14 AM

Potentially Chertoff to be the replacement at DOJ? This coming from the same president administration that tried to give us Harriet Meyers as a SCOTUS candidate, should this be any surprise to anyone?

Weebork on August 27, 2007 at 12:22 AM

I wish that you all would stop ragging on Chertoff.

He is a visionary man who is looking out for us all.

He knows that our economy would fall apart if we did not have hard working Amigos from the south to pick our sacred lettuce, doing the job that lazy Americans would not even do for $50 an hour.

He also knows, what apparently none of you do, that lettuce is a wonder plant.

Someday soon a cure for cancer will be found from an extract from lettuce.

Someday soon highly fermented lettuce will power all our cars.

Someday soon lettuce reactor plants will provide all of our
electricity.

A derivative from lettuce may even hold the cure for old age!!!

And the thing is folks that only hard working Amigos from the south know how to pick lettuce in just the right and loving way to keep it from losing all of these magical properties.

Have you hugged a head of lettuce today?

Have you sent Secretary Chertoff a nice card or email letting him know just how much you appreciate the wonderful job he has done at DHS and how great an AG he would make?

Think about it.

MB4 on August 27, 2007 at 12:32 AM

Why Chertoff?

Is there anyway to respond to this question without getting banned? I think not.

aengus on August 27, 2007 at 12:36 AM

Dang. What if hecklers constantly pelted Chertoff with lettuce? Now that would be funny.

Theworldisnotenough on August 27, 2007 at 12:38 AM

It’s actually quite normal for people to come and go during the years of the administration and I think the news makes far bigger of a deal about this than other presidents in the past. Clinton had many people come and go.

With that said, I really hate bush’s choices at times. chertoff is a total idiot and he really kind of proved that with the whole backing of the shamnesty bill. He lost all credibility.

Highrise on August 27, 2007 at 1:00 AM

Look out!! Things are gonna shape up now!!! Bwahahahahahahaha

DfDeportation on August 27, 2007 at 1:00 AM

chertoff…of course it would have to be another shamnesty supporter. arghhhh!!

JustTruth101 on August 27, 2007 at 1:11 AM

“What do Bernard Kerik and Michael Chertoff have in common?

Both have proven to be disastrous choices to head the Department of Homeland Security. But that’s not the only thing they share. Both were enthusiastically championed for this all-important post by Rudolph Giuliani.

As it happens, Giuliani was largely responsible for putting each man on the political map and helping launch their careers.”
- Greg Sargent from The American Prospect Online (Feb. 15, 2006)

MB4 on August 27, 2007 at 1:25 AM

So does this mean Rudy’s going to ride in to save the Homeland Security Dept. from going off a cliff?

NightmareOnKStreet on August 27, 2007 at 1:27 AM

OT

Divest Iran

“What of private pension funds? Here the lead is being taken by Teamsters Union President Jim Hoffa, who last week urged managers of 170 funds that invest Teamster pension money to sell all shares of companies that do business in Iran. Hoffa has vigorously protested the arrest and torture of union leaders in Iran and seems to be following in the steps of the late AFL-CIO President Lane Kirkland, who did so much to destabilize communism in Eastern Europe. Divestment by private pension funds will be aided if the Senate passes the bill (sponsored by Reps. Barney Frank and Mark Kirk, Sens. Barack Obama and Sam Brownback and already passed by the House) to shield investment managers from lawsuits based on any losses from terror-free investing.

In a time of great partisan strife, the divestment movement is deeply bipartisan. Bills have been passed in the heavily Democratic legislature in California and the heavily Republican legislature in Florida. Sponsors include supporters of the war in Iraq — including Ohio legislator Josh Mandel, now on his second deployment there as a Marine reservist — and strong opponents. We may not be at war with the mullah regime, but they have been waging war against us for a long time, since the hostage seizure in 1979 and the bombing of the Marine Corps barracks in Lebanon in 1983.”

MB4 on August 27, 2007 at 1:47 AM

Is this serious?

Why did the word impeachment just cross my mind?

Montana on August 27, 2007 at 1:47 AM

Why… oh why… when I saw this headline did the Movie “Dumb and Dumber” come to mind?

Romeo13 on August 27, 2007 at 1:52 AM

Why… oh why… when I saw this headline did the Movie “Dumb and Dumber” come to mind?

Romeo13 on August 27, 2007 at 1:52 AM

Probably because they have almost identical scripts.

MB4 on August 27, 2007 at 2:05 AM

Only if GWB picks Rick Santorum for the new Homeland Security Chief would this make any sense.

(Tancredo would be better, but I think he’s busy.)

profitsbeard on August 27, 2007 at 2:38 AM

Could we start a grassroots campaign to have Michelle selected as AG?

Texas Nick 77 on August 27, 2007 at 5:49 AM

What a lousy joke.
Replacing a joke with a joke.
I hope this is ALL just a joke,
and that Bush is going to replace BOTH of them with competent people.

LegendHasIt on August 27, 2007 at 6:44 AM

I wouldn’t hire Chertoff to wash my car. This guy actually let these words come out of his mouth:
“ A border fence is a 20th century solution to a 21st century problem”

Question: Why do prisons have fences?
Answer: Because they work, ya F’ing Cherkoff!

TheSitRep on August 27, 2007 at 7:26 AM

Oh crap, I thought people were joking when they said that Chertoff was one of Rudy’s people.

Buzzy on August 27, 2007 at 7:54 AM

Divestment by private pension funds will be aided if the Senate passes the bill (sponsored by Reps. Barney Frank and Mark Kirk, Sens. Barack Obama and Sam Brownback and already passed by the House) to shield investment managers from lawsuits based on any losses from terror-free investing.

MB4 on August 27, 2007 at 1:47 AM

I agree, but it wouldn’t take long before “terror-free investing” was politicized. Some pols. would want to include Israel, some the US itself for our “terror” in Iraq, some would want to exclude terror groups like Fatah or Hamas.
Then we’d hear the inevitable “discrimination” charges, which while increasingly toothless in the US, still get the NY Times and MSM juices flowing.

I hate that cynical view but its like the UN. A potential force for good is a force for evil.

JiangxiDad on August 27, 2007 at 8:11 AM

Maybe they’ll make one of the Flying Imans the new head of Homeland Security.

Buy Danish on August 27, 2007 at 8:43 AM

Bushies

A bit off topic, but I can’t stand this term. I will, however, feel entirely free to retaliate if we’re ever again subject to the ‘Clinties.’

James on August 27, 2007 at 9:01 AM

aengus — well said. But, let’s give it a go, ay lads?

Talk about win-win-win!

Win: Michael Jerkoff desperately needed to removed from his post, and Bush’s ego and loyalty blood oath doesn’t allow for him to be fired.

Win: Gonzales desperately needed to be fired, but (see above) that wasn’t happening, and so he looked at the writing on the wall and saw 18 months remaining in the best case scenario for his working career, and decided to bail out and get a job with a Bush connected law firm quick, while he still can.

Win!: Americans needed a real attorney for Attorney General (oh well), and a person with a functioning brain for head of DHS (cross you fingers or pray, depending on your disposition), and now we have a shot at it.

Jaibones on August 27, 2007 at 9:16 AM

This is just peachy. Chert; a cojones-less political tool.

George! Stop trying so hard!! It’s confirmed: you’re a first rate, second rate president!!!

locomotivebreath1901 on August 27, 2007 at 9:37 AM

If it is possible, Chertoff has been a bigger embarrassement than Gonzales. At a time when this nation is desperate for competent leadership, Bush is proving that it will not come from the top. Being a conservative, it is becoming more difficult to explain one bad decision after another. When decisions like this are so incompetent, it makes the rest of Bush’s term a little scary. What else can this man screw up?

volsense on August 27, 2007 at 9:39 AM

OK… let me be the first to nominate for the new AG of the waning Bush admin….

RON PAUL !!!!!

Always Right on August 27, 2007 at 9:40 AM

Why Chertoff? Was Ja-Ja-Johnny Sutton not available?

CitizenJim on August 27, 2007 at 9:41 AM

Could we start a grassroots campaign to have Michelle selected as AG?

Texas Nick 77 on August 27, 2007 at 5:49 AM

If only…

Yakko77 on August 27, 2007 at 9:58 AM

Yea, Chertoff is so good as Homeland Security Director, he’ll be great as AG.
I saw a little of the remake (?) of The Living Dead and I coulda swore I saw Chertoff gnawing on a woman’s leg. Maybe if he got a decent meal he would be able to think straight… Maybe not.

Christine on August 27, 2007 at 10:33 AM

eunuch

infidel4life on August 26, 2007 at 11:32 PM

Eunuchs were men castrated so they could guard the harem. That sounds about right.

I wouldn’t hire Chertoff to wash my car. This guy actually let these words come out of his mouth:
“ A border fence is a 20th century solution to a 21st century problem”

Question: Why do prisons have fences?
Answer: Because they work, ya F’ing Cherkoff!

TheSitRep on August 27, 2007 at 7:26 AM

I hate to use the b.s. word but it is obvious Bush is bitch-slapping the anti-amnesty crowd with this move. Put in charge of all Federal Prosecution the leading champion of not enforcing immigration law.

It is no longer transparent that Bush is fighting the war with all his heart and soul – the real war – the war against the bigoted American citizens who oppose amnesty and his beloved no borders with Mexico plan

Bush does not see a difference between American citizens and Mexican citizens. He does not give American citizens a higher claim to America than Mexicans

I suggest Bush follow his heart and appoint the illegal alien lady who hid out in a Church for a year. The one sponsored by the Mexican legislature. She speaks Spanish, not English. She believes any Mexican has right of patria to the USA. Just like Bush and Chertoff she considers opponents to amnesty to be bigots.

Unlike Chertoff she is not a citizen and therefore has more credibility on the amnesty issue. She will not have to pretend to honor a silly oath to enforce the laws of this nation and defend the borders

entagor on August 27, 2007 at 11:53 AM

Replacing Gonzalez with Chertoff is like replacing Frick with Frack. These two cabinet-level government officials are once again living proof of the “Peter Principle”.

Jonas Parker on August 27, 2007 at 12:03 PM

Mr. Chertoff, please go to a speech class and raise that
voice in a way that it sounds more masculine at least. It
pains my ears to hear your sissy voice. As much as you may be well educated, and with a high I.Q., your ability to
come across to the average Joe-Six-Pack is somewhat lacking.
Cheers.

gary on August 27, 2007 at 1:14 PM