Do your roll around with them and wrestle, or do you kick them in the head and stomach?

Buy Danish on August 14, 2007 at 1:33 PM

I used to play fight with my kids all the time. There were many fake throws, punches and kicks. There were also many time outs to let the laughter subside before we could continue. Sure sometimes they got a little overzealous and daddy took one on the chin or in the family jewels, but I always knew that might happen.

They were also taught that there were limits and they were expected to stay within them unless they were threatened. Play like that shown in the video is not harmful at all. It’s just some fun rough housing with dad.

Three dragons enter, one dragon leaves. (Okay, two.)

All you need to know about dragons.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=dKR_44eDf1M

Here is an excerpt from one of my previous comments which if you had read would have saved you having to tell me that the father wasn’t really kicking the kids:

Um, if he really kicked them, they’d be dead.

BigOldDog,

Buy Danish on August 14, 2007 at 11:49 AM

PLEASE go back and read the previous comments. I am not going to waste my time by rewriting everything I have already said.

That being said, comparing what a child does to a father to what a father does to a child as if they are somehow equivalent actions is a bit bizarre.

But neither does the dad in this video. He is barely touching them and they are clearly acting along with it.

By your logic (any touching with the hand or foot is bad) we must reprimand the kids. After all, one of them punched their dad what must have been 40 times in the leg. Wow, that’s a dangerous child. (/sarc)

if you teach them boundaries when they’re younger, they’ll retain them as they grow up (i.e. Stop means stop, none of this, that, etc).

HarryStar,

Please go back to my earlier comments. I have already stated that wrestling and playing with toy guns is good precisely because it teaches boundaries.

However, kicking people in the head and stomach is outside of what I would consider normal boundaries, particularly when taught to children who are toddlers.

Indeed, if my kid ever tried to do that the wrestling game would stop immediately. That’s not what I’m seeing in this video.

HarryStar,

These kids aren’t 9 and 12 years old like your kids. They are clearly 6 (if that)and under.

BigOldDog,

I’ll have to take your word for it! I don’t see how this Dad is going to be able to convince children at that age that it’s okay to do this to family members but not to playmates.

Buy Danish on August 14, 2007 at 1:25 PM

I started wrestling, horsing around when they were the same age (probably a big younger). The thing is, if you teach them boundaries when they’re younger, they’ll retain them as they grow up (i.e. Stop means stop, none of this, that, etc).

As far as teaching them that it’s OK with family members and not with playmates, it’s really quite easy.

(No, I’m not being sarcastic either BuyDanish) “Guys, this is just something that we do. You DO NOT do this with anybody else in school otherwise we can’t wrestle anymore.”

Again, every parent is different along with every child. Many times it depends on how the children were raised, boundaries, etc. What one person considers “wrong” doesn’t necessarily make it so.

I was just reminded about when I took my children flying with me in a Cessna 172 (They were 5,5 & 8). Many of my wifes friends thought I was crazy, how could you let that happen, it’s so dangerous, etc, etc.

It all depends on your point of view.

I was just t

Do your roll around with them and wrestle, or do you kick them in the head and stomach?

I think the video is very sweet in addition to being very funny

It certainly contained a number of suppressed giggles and smiles.

These kids aren’t 9 and 12 years old like your kids. They are clearly 6 (if that)and under.

BigOldDog,

I’ll have to take your word for it! I don’t see how this Dad is going to be able to convince children at that age that it’s okay to do this to family members but not to playmates.

Where’s the “Kung Fu Fighting” song soundtrack?

Just like when kids play with toy guns you are supposed to teach them not to aim them at people.

I teach them the proper use of guns…granted toy guns until they learn right from wrong, but the same training…”Shoot them a second time to make sure they are dead.”

There is a difference between wrestling with dad and the over the top stuff that is in this video. When you wrestle you also teach boundaries to your kid, like no hitting in the face and head, and no kicking. Just like when kids play with toy guns you are supposed to teach them not to aim them at people.

I teach my four year old granddaughter how to fight. But, I only teach her moves that she can effectively do, such as gouging the eyes, using an object to the teeth and groin.

Another thing I am drilling into her head is, “If a guy asks you out on a date, you tell them that they have to ask Grandpa first.”

Of course kids are kids and do this stuff to each other, but that is not the same thing as having your father teach you to kick people in the head – at an age where you are unlikely to be able to differentiate between playing with daddy and playing in the sandbox with your friends.

We didn’t need anyone to teach us how to kick each other in the head — we were born with the knowledge. These kids are not going to be anymore violent than most kids. Probably a lot less since they have a father in their lives that spends time with them.

Buy Danish on August 14, 2007 at 11:49 AM

I find it difficult to criticize anybody who is genuinely concerned for children as you obviously are. I think you’d be a lot more comfortable with what you saw if you had some martial arts training and/or sat through some kids classes. It’s not nearly as bad as it looks. If I thought it was, I’d be on your side 100%.

As for teaching them Martial Arts, which I have no problem with as long as it is age-appropriate, do you honestly think these kids have the reasoning ability at that age to absorb these ethics?

There is also a difference between being taught to fight as part of a discipline, and playing around in the backyard with Daddy.

Buy Danish on August 14, 2007 at 10:47 AM

Yes, I would say that they have the reasoning ability.

I’m passing this video to my 3 boys (12 & 9 yr old twins). Our rule was quite simple…Time-Out rules all. We’ve been in the middle of “4 go in, 1 comes out”, flips, twists, etc.

SOOOO much fun. The reality & honesty of the answer is that it all depends on the parent(s). I’ve seen completely out of control kids hitting others, acting up, etc. As for myself, in a “controlled” environment, makes for lots of bonding between myself and my sons.

P.S. As my oldest son bought boxing gloves for both of us, he’s quite proud to say, “I hit Dad in the nose and gave him a bloody nose”. Needless to say, he learned how to uppercut and I didn’t quite realize that he did. Guess what, I do now :-)). It’s all in good fun though and he’s learning self defense at the same time.

Blake on August 14, 2007 at 11:39 AM

Blake,

Fist of all, Martial Arts is not “horseplay”. It is a discipline. Unless you are saying you never engaged in any horseplay at all, which would be unusual, to say the least.

Of course kids are kids and do this stuff to each other, but that is not the same thing as having your father teach you to kick people in the head – at an age where you are unlikely to be able to differentiate between playing with daddy and playing in the sandbox with your friends.

I have never claimed that Martial Arts makes you more violent. I do claim that these kids are too young and are being taught behavior that they are apt to emulate with their friends – outside of the Martial Arts classroom (or in this case, outside of their own backyard).

Um, if he really kicked them, they’d be dead.

BigOldDog,

I realize that, and only noted it preemptively so I wouldn’t have to listen to someone inevitably chirping in and telling me that “he wasn’t really kicking them”.

I believe we are at an impasse, but for the record I do agree with you on most other things!

Alden Pyle,

Uh, “Discipline” as in The “Martial Arts discipline” does not mean to “discipline your children”.

It means

a branch of instruction or learning: the disciplines of history and economics.

Sheesh.

Buy Danish on August 14, 2007 at 11:14 AM

Um, if he really kicked them, they’d be dead.

In martial arts you strike all the time w/o really hitting. It’s all controlled choreography.