Obviously they’ll have to arm him with a “Predator”-esque shoulder-mounted laser cannon so that jihadis reduced to laughter at the sight of Teddy Ruxpin rolling onto the battlefield can be dealt with in the appropriate manner.

Funniest thing I read all day.

While I applaud the soldier-saver robot, how about putting some money into jihadi-killer robots? How about something with a Satan head on it and bulletproof speakers on it that blare in Arabic, “KILLER ROBOTS ARE COMING TO KILL YOU INSURGENT DOGS!” Load up the jihadi-bots with shotguns, pistols, assault weapons. Maybe arms with freaking buzz saws on them or chain flails, something to make the jihadis crap in their turbans. If the insurgents somehow disable one of them, they should have booby traps on them that blow when handled.

Our guys could ditch the body armor back in the FOB and operate the jihadi-bots from afar with Nintendo controls while having a cold one and some barbecue.

Tantor on June 7, 2007 at 6:36 PM

Thats what I liked to! It’s called the SWORDS robot. First ever to break Issac Asimovs’ rule.

Our guys could ditch the body armor back in the FOB and operate the jihadi-bots from afar with Nintendo controls while having a cold one and some barbecue.

James on June 7, 2007 at 3:20 PM

Bwahahahahaha!

No, seriously, this is never going to replace corpsmen and medics. Maybe once you get the wounded to a safe(er) location, you could use them as a sort of automated litter bearer, but to actually make pickup? Not gonna happen. Not enough adaptability, not enough maneuverability, and too easy to jam and/or break. I’m still holding out for a full fledged BattleMech…

Who is going to protect the wounded soldiers being held up as targets by these robots that don’t have a clue how to duck or shoot back?

Woody

Actually, that is exactly how it would be used! The rest of the squad would be able to provide cover fire instead of one or two having to carry the injured individual! More firepower!!!

Obviously they’ll have to arm him with a “Predator”-esque shoulder-mounted laser cannon so that jihadis reduced to laughter at the sight of Teddy Ruxpin rolling onto the battlefield can be dealt with in the appropriate manner

They’ll have back up….

Woody

Battlefield Extraction-Assist Robot

Hmm…needs more words. How about putting ‘Coordinated Action Rearguard Equipment’ in front of that?

The robot recently showed how it can climb up and down stairs with a human-size dummy in its arms…

So that’s what Congress did over their spring break.

Exit question: U.S. troops being the bad-asses that they are, they’re going to end up painting his head to look like a flaming skull or something from an Iron Maiden album cover, aren’t they?

I’m thinking … Photoshop contest?

With this enemy, the wounded need to be taken from the field under cover. These people blow-up children without a second thought, they will have no compunction about shooting an exposed soldier, wounded or not.

seriously–teddy bear?

notwithstanding room for improvement: quite cool.

“A really important thing when you’re dealing with casualties is trying to maintain that human touch,” says Gary Gilbert of the US army’s Telemedicine and Advanced Technology Research Center in Frederick, Maryland

Then you guys at the TATRC need to make this thing look like LeAnn Tweeden in a camo-colored miniskirt.

U.S. troops being the bad-asses that they are, they’re going to end up painting his head to look like a flaming skull or something from an Iron Maiden album cover, aren’t they?

“If you’re gonna die, die with your boots on. If you’re gonna cry, just move along.”

Well for sure the U.N. will never need one.

Limerick on June 7, 2007 at 1:41 PM

But they might try to call it “illegal.”

Exit question: U.S. troops being the bad-asses that they are, they’re going to end up painting his head to look like a flaming skull or something from an Iron Maiden album cover, aren’t they?

Why yes, yes we will.

Hooray for the age of cyber warfare.
Baphomet on June 7, 2007 at 1:28 PM

When do we get Mechs?

Teddy Ruxpin rolling onto the battlefield can be dealt with in the appropriate manner.

I knew it when I first saw those commercials. One day, Ruxpin is gonna go killing people. You could tell.

It’s like the kid in the Werther’s Originals commercials. You know he’s gonna ice somebody, some day.