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Lethally adorable baby polar bear lookin’ for love

posted at 4:37 pm on April 5, 2007 by Allahpundit
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He’s world famous, physically irresistible, and not getting any younger.

Strike while the iron is hot, my friend.

They’re fixing him up with an older woman, too. Hot.

While he is a bit young yet to be thinking about the birds and the bees, the search is on for a suitable girlfriend for Knut. Indeed, zoos from around the world have reportedly expressed interest in having little polar bear girls get to know Berlin’s little polar bear boy.

Most recently, the zoo in the western German city of Gelsenkirchen on Wednesday made it known that it would be interested in having Knut meet two-year-old polar bear Lara. “In theory,” a spokeswoman for the Gelsenkirchen zoo told the news agency ddp on Wednesday, “he could already come here when he turns one.”

While Lara might be ready to reproduce as early as 2009, Knut most likely won’t begin showing interest in mating until he’s four. But introducing them as early as possible increases the likelihood of a Knut Jr. And because Lara’s enclosure was designed with a romantic couple in mind — indeed she had a boyfriend named Strupo but he died just before Christmas [Heart-ache. -- ed.] — it would make sense for Knut to eventually move in with her rather than the other way around.

I can’t believe this isn’t a Disney movie yet. Right now, somewhere in California, a guy from Pixar is furiously googling “Knut” for ideas.

Can our readers sustain one more toxic blast of cuteness right in the face? I think you can. There’s video at the Spiegel link in the sidebar — but take heed. You will, at some point during the clip, encounter this image:

knut-tongue.jpg

I trust you’ll comport yourself with the proper dignity.


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i’d hit it.

jummy on April 5, 2007 at 4:38 PM

They’re fixing him up with an older woman, too.

Who knew you could mate bears with cougars…

Bad Candy on April 5, 2007 at 4:42 PM

Hello there cutie
http://xark.typepad.com/my_weblog/images/worlds_ugliest_dog.JPG

Zetterson on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM

Mesquite, hickory, a little lemon juice, honey, thow in some habaneros, tenderize………ohhhh yeah!

Limerick on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM

Bad Candy

ha!

jummy on April 5, 2007 at 4:45 PM

I’m surprised Ace hasn’t volunteered.

Pervert.

natesnake on April 5, 2007 at 4:45 PM

Zetterson on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM

Aw, Zetterson… a little content warning would be appreciated. That was just… just… wrong

dalewalt on April 5, 2007 at 4:57 PM

I think Lara might want to note the little love accessories in the backround.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that, sometimes the older babes dig that kind of thing, or so I’ve heard.

bbz123 on April 5, 2007 at 4:58 PM

First he murders everyone in site. Now he’s sexin’ up the ladies. Nice.

lorien1973 on April 5, 2007 at 5:09 PM

Zetterson on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM

I take it that was your cute offsets for the thread?

Esthier on April 5, 2007 at 5:11 PM

Zetterson on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM
Aw, Zetterson… a little content warning would be appreciated. That was just… just… wrong

dalewalt on April 5, 2007 at 4:57 PM

Haha. Sorry. I’ll be sure to add that next time.

Zetterson on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM
I take it that was your cute offsets for the thread?

Esthier on April 5, 2007 at 5:11 PM

Bingo Esthier. Very sharp of you as usual.

Zetterson on April 5, 2007 at 5:15 PM

The movie’s title: “Bustin’ A Knut”

ccwbass on April 5, 2007 at 5:17 PM

but take heed. You will, at some point during the clip, encounter this image:

That was not a strong enough warning. I didn’t realize those were pictures from when he was even younger.

Esthier on April 5, 2007 at 5:17 PM

If you think he’s cute now, wait a few years and go in and pet him. You’ll soon find out just how cute he can really be.

RedinBlueCounty on April 5, 2007 at 5:22 PM

Yeah, but by then he won’t look cute anymore either.

Esthier on April 5, 2007 at 5:23 PM

Yeah, but by then he won’t look cute anymore either.

Esthier on April 5, 2007 at 5:23 PM

you see, and that’s where i’ve struck a position completely opposite of the enviros who wanted him put down because he was being raised to be unnaturally cute and comfortable with humans. i think he should be put down the moment he becomes aestheticly unappealing.

jummy on April 5, 2007 at 5:35 PM

Mesquite, hickory, a little lemon juice, honey, thow in some habaneros, tenderize………ohhhh yeah!
Limerick on April 5, 2007 at 4:43 PM

You forgot the brown sugar and red wine vin. What time’s the dinner? Remember, no Miller Lite!

SouthernDem on April 5, 2007 at 5:37 PM

i think he should be put down the moment he becomes aestheticly unappealing.

jummy on April 5, 2007 at 5:35 PM

nice

Esthier on April 5, 2007 at 5:38 PM

This really has to be the cutest thing I have ever seen.
Best of luck to you Knut. May the humans find you a suitable mate…

Babs on April 5, 2007 at 5:50 PM

Did you take a look at the last 2 pics in Spiegel’s photo gallery? There’s going to be Knut the video game.

I don’t care if there’s not enough meat for everybody or enough hide for a fur coat; get me my club.

steveegg on April 5, 2007 at 6:24 PM

I wonder what’s the whacko environmentalist opinion of this

Defector01 on April 5, 2007 at 6:25 PM

BILF?

armylawyer on April 5, 2007 at 6:30 PM

Allah, you have a soft spot for this cute little guy:) That’s sweet.

wytammic on April 5, 2007 at 6:33 PM

BILF?

armylawyer on April 5, 2007 at 6:30 P

HAHA!!! Sully’s so gonna email you…

Bad Candy on April 5, 2007 at 6:52 PM

Haha, wytammic beat me to the punch.

Can our readers sustain one more toxic blast of cuteness right in the face?

I’m surprised… this is a new side to AP that I never thought existed! It’s one thing to crush on Bethany or KP, but to repeatedly use the word “cute” when discussing a fuzzy animal? I didn’t think you had it in you, AP.

tiekitwist on April 5, 2007 at 6:52 PM

Leonardo Dicaprio just sent this urgent message: I’d hit it!

(If that joke doesn’t make sense to folks, check out the cover girls on the latest Vanity Fair)
https://w1.buysub.com/pubs/N3/VYF/doneefirst.jsp?cds_page_id=2393&cds_mag_code=VYF&id=1175813634784&lsid=70951753405024703&vid=2&cds_response_key=GLDI2K01&cds_mag_code=VYF

RightWinged on April 5, 2007 at 6:54 PM

I fear I’ll never be able to feel this creature’s intestines squeezing through my fingers. You all are such suckers – falling for this killing machine’s doe eyes.

Follow. But. Follow only if ye be men of valour, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived. Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.

lorien1973 on April 5, 2007 at 6:55 PM

CONTENT WARNING!!!

The only solution to this polar bears lethal adorability is to toss a baby seal in there and watch him tear it to shreds.

csdeven on April 5, 2007 at 7:03 PM

A dor a ble.

Knut for president!

pencilnub on April 5, 2007 at 7:05 PM

First panda porn now polar bear dating services. What will they think of next?

vcferlita on April 5, 2007 at 7:15 PM

What’s up with the bear and Rosie Allah? Jeesh

Drtuddle on April 5, 2007 at 7:15 PM

The Berlin Zoo has seen its stock price more than double since Knut’s birth.

I love it. Just think what the stock would be if they followed that wacko advice and killed Knut.

Now if only my dogs made my stock price go up instead of eating me out of house and home.

Kini on April 5, 2007 at 7:26 PM

What’s up with the bear and Rosie Allah? Jeesh

Drtuddle on April 5, 2007 at 7:15 PM

They both get entirely too much attention for being exactly what they are? Cute and cuddly vs homely and repulsive. I leave it to others to decide which is which.

csdeven on April 5, 2007 at 7:46 PM

Right now, somewhere in California, a guy from Pixar is furiously googling “Knut” for ideas.

If they weren’t…they are now.

major john on April 5, 2007 at 7:55 PM

the enviros who wanted him put down because he was being raised to be unnaturally cute and comfortable with humans.

All polar bears are comfortable with humans as a food source.

RedinBlueCounty on April 5, 2007 at 7:57 PM

Now if only my dogs made my stock price go up instead of eating me out of house and home.

Well, you could buy stock in Purina. Just a suggestion.

RedinBlueCounty on April 5, 2007 at 8:04 PM

Dangerous. Definitely dangerous.

RedWinged Blackbird on April 5, 2007 at 8:27 PM

Well, you could buy stock in Purina. Just a suggestion.

RedinBlueCounty on April 5, 2007 at 8:04 PM

Nah, cause of two words, wheat gluten.

Kini on April 5, 2007 at 9:18 PM

Knut for president!

pencilnub on April 5, 2007 at 7:05 PM

Nah. Romney’s got more hair. And better teeth.

Knut for Secretary of Defense? Maybe …

Ali-Bubba on April 5, 2007 at 9:21 PM

Thank you for posting, AP, I am unable to turn away from his cuteness…

JustTruth101 on April 5, 2007 at 10:53 PM

Polar Pandering Palooza…

elgeneralisimo on April 5, 2007 at 11:20 PM

First he murders everyone in site. Now he’s sexin’ up the ladies. Nice.

Does Chuck Norris know about this? There could be a perfect storm on the rise. Or the coolest pet-owner relationship evuh!

Pablo on April 6, 2007 at 10:08 AM

Ok, my 3 yr old daughter has been asking to watch this video over and over again all day, thanks Allah

vcferlita on April 6, 2007 at 2:38 PM

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