Audio: Fred! defends Goracle, smashes global warming skeptics

posted at 10:26 am on March 22, 2007 by Allahpundit

No, no, just kidding. Ain’t no room in the cracker barrel for a city slicker like Algore and his fancypants talk about emissions and carbon offsets. Fred’s firmly in the skeptic category.

I’ve no doubt the down-home vibe is sincere, but honestly, it’s starting to wear on me. I’m going to go cleanse the palate by listening to Rudy lay into that guy about his ferret obsession. Ah, Noo Yawk.

Update: Fred’s already tied with Romney in Ohio, which says a lot more about Romney than it does about Fred.


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You ass.

lorien1973 on March 22, 2007 at 10:27 AM

I about had a heart attack, dammit. :( :mad:

lorien1973 on March 22, 2007 at 10:28 AM

You got me. With the level of distrust between the GOP and conservatives, it would not have been a shock.

Valiant on March 22, 2007 at 10:30 AM

Dammit, AP. You’re going to kill a reader one of these days with those jokes.

As long as it’s not me, keep on singing.

steveegg on March 22, 2007 at 10:30 AM

Where. Is. My. Heart. Meds?

Limerick on March 22, 2007 at 10:31 AM

Thanks Allah, I went through some emotions I didn’t realize I had left in me after reading that headline…

Verbal Abuse on March 22, 2007 at 10:31 AM

:( :mad: … Not funny… someone call The Boss!

IntheNet on March 22, 2007 at 10:31 AM

Heh. The ferret rant is available as an mp3 on Oliver Willis’ site.

Slublog on March 22, 2007 at 10:34 AM

Glad I clicked through. I almost had my razor blade out. “Homey?”- maybe. “Bullsh*t artist?”- I don’t think so.

james hooker on March 22, 2007 at 10:40 AM

Arrrrrgh!!! The emotional swing between mouse clicks was too much. Good thing I have a thorazine auto-injector.

darwin on March 22, 2007 at 10:41 AM

Hmmm. Humor from a blog site whose initials are HA

Thanks, AP… I’ll have to do an extra hour on the treadmill tonight to fix the damage that jump to my bloodpressure caused :^(

db on March 22, 2007 at 10:44 AM

Fred’s gonna get ya for this….

Romeo13 on March 22, 2007 at 10:44 AM

It’s the big one, ‘Lizbeth! I’m comin’ home!

fusionaddict on March 22, 2007 at 10:44 AM

That was a painful page load followed by garbled cuss.

sunny on March 22, 2007 at 10:45 AM

Michelle should outlaw that kind of sinister and coronary-inducing behavior on her site!

Darksean on March 22, 2007 at 10:46 AM

Wow, talk about having my heart drop for a few seconds. Don’t do that!!!

StephC on March 22, 2007 at 10:48 AM

Now that I’m over being angry at Fred, and then angry at you, that headline really is funny to read.

conservator on March 22, 2007 at 10:48 AM

Nice going, Allah…thanks for the agita.

As for Romney, bad as it sounds, a dog with a sign over its head would poll within a couple of points of him right about now. He’s done, as is Newt.

Kid from Brooklyn on March 22, 2007 at 10:48 AM

Are you trying to kill your readers? We’ve barely recovered from the nearly-lethal cuteness of that darn baby polar bear, and now this!

aero on March 22, 2007 at 10:50 AM

April Fool’s Day came a little early today.
nice one!
b.t.w….you owe me a fresh cup of coffee.

stevezilla on March 22, 2007 at 10:51 AM

AP, joo are teh suck.

In re Thompson v. Romney, Romney is triangulating to the conservative slot. Thompson would be given it if he were to run, which would effectively kill the Romney campaign, both in terms of winning a primary and any chance he might have for a veep slot. I expect the Romney folks to go on the attack pretty soon.

spmat on March 22, 2007 at 10:51 AM

“Natural” is a better word than “sincere” … sincere implies he has to consciously intend it.

Anwyn on March 22, 2007 at 10:52 AM

I’ve no doubt the down-home vibe is sincere, but honestly, it’s starting to wear on me.

Well, it’s going to keep wearing, because Fred actually did grow up in Tennessee. Al Gore “grew up in Tennessee” by purchasing “territorial offsets,” whereby the Gore suite at the Fairfax Hotel in Washington became a Protectorate of the State of Tennessee.

AP, do you think that that voice would, indeed, turn off enough people from Noo Yawk and Chicaaaago to affect their choices?

eeyore on March 22, 2007 at 10:53 AM

Sean Hannity’s who would you vote for poll has Fred at 53% against the rest of em’ You can spike the poll further here: http://www.hannity.com/ (left side 1/4 way down)

The draft fred site is here: http://www.fred08.com/home.html

You can also go home at 2:00 today and watch Fred on TNT.

Fill your life with Fred. That has a nice ring, “President Fred”

sunny on March 22, 2007 at 10:54 AM

I knew you were kidding. I heard Fred on KTAR this morning. He’d make a fun and folksy president. I don’t think he’s really acting on Law and Order…he’s just talking.

jdpaz on March 22, 2007 at 10:54 AM

Ha, ha, ha.

Good one Allah!

BillyRayValentine on March 22, 2007 at 10:55 AM

After getting over the inital shock and starting to see the humor in it, I felt a strange emotion somewhere between nausea and hilarity.

I just threw up a little bit out my nose.

db on March 22, 2007 at 10:56 AM

I heard him on the radio myself, hmm I thought, intresting take on the subject.
Came over here and thought I was just imagining what I thought I heard.
AP, there’s a special place for people that joke like that……

CBarker on March 22, 2007 at 10:56 AM

Fred’s already tied with Romney in Ohio, which says a lot more about Romney than it does about Fred.

No, it says a lot about me, ’cause I live there and I’m cookin’ the books!

One Fred to rule them all…

saint kansas on March 22, 2007 at 10:56 AM

My lawyer informs me there is a meal ticket in that headline somewhere……

Limerick on March 22, 2007 at 10:58 AM

AP was running April Fools test 001 Alpha…

allie on March 22, 2007 at 10:58 AM

OMG! I read that headline and my entire day was shot. Nice job, lmao!

Gregor on March 22, 2007 at 11:00 AM

One Fred to rule them all…

saint kansas on March 22, 2007 at 10:56 AM

Genius!!

Darksean on March 22, 2007 at 11:01 AM

Fred’s definitely growing on me. I’m a southerner, and his down-homeisms (made up a word) are almost too much for me, too. But what he says amidst all those cute phrases makes a whole lot of sense. And he’s entertaining, too, which doesn’t hurt at all.

I’m still for Newt, but I’ll certainly pay close attention if Fred enters the race. He’s easy to picture as the next president, isn’t he?

Side note: Didn’t LBJ talk sort of like that, too? Before my time, but it seems like some of the clips I’ve heard of him talking casually have a bit of that “down-home” flavor to them as well.

aero on March 22, 2007 at 11:01 AM

When I read the headline, my first thought was, no way. I’m glad it was confirmed. I know Fred Thompson has enough common sense to not buy into this globaloney warming hooey. Tennessee is a great state, and couldn’t have spawned another like the “Goracle.”

liberty on March 22, 2007 at 11:05 AM

Cute Allah…will your next headline announce a Thompson/Edwards ticket?

Catseye on March 22, 2007 at 11:11 AM

Allah, you’re a sick puppy, you really are. Toying with your faithful like that…

dalewalt on March 22, 2007 at 11:13 AM

Or will it be a Gore/Thompson ticket…so the Goracle can claim Stupidity Offsets?

Catseye on March 22, 2007 at 11:14 AM

There for a minute my rising hopes were dashed and I was plunged back into the mire of candidate doldrums. You must have missed your morning coffee to be in the mood to write such a cruel post! :)

I’ve had so much heart-ache over the GOP in the last few years I was totally gotchaed.

INC on March 22, 2007 at 11:17 AM

I’m not sure what’s funnier…the joke, or the thought of AP sitting in front of his computer in his bathrobe, cackling at our shock and horror.

Slublog on March 22, 2007 at 11:19 AM

Yep, just more proof, Thompson/Pence ’08.

tormod on March 22, 2007 at 11:23 AM

Ya’ got me, but good.

I like Fred’s use of simple words to convey his messages, but I too get weary of corn-pone. I like to see a picture of Fred holding a baseball bat.

spd rdr on March 22, 2007 at 11:24 AM

You hurt this site when you do things like that Allah. Are you now planning to belittle Thompson and give him basically the same treatment you give Tom Tancredo? That is what you have done so far, but only in a slightly more subtle way. This is suppose to be a site for the Right, but you constantly deride some of the best people on the Right. Then you wonder why some people think this site might be better off without you.

Maxx on March 22, 2007 at 11:25 AM

Allah,

I have an idea for a contest the blogosphere could promote:

If Fred Thompson jumps in the race, which candidate will be the first to suggest that Law & Order reruns should be considered as an in-kind contribution under campaign finance law.

bert169 on March 22, 2007 at 11:28 AM

… or the thought of AP sitting in front of his computer in his bathrobe…
Slublog

I’m reminded of the movie Real Genius:

Chris: And I followed him into the closet and down into the steam tunnels, and there I saw the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my life.
Mitch: What?
Chris: Hollyfeld Allahpundit in his pajamas.

db on March 22, 2007 at 11:34 AM

Audio: Fred! defends Goracle, smashes global warming skeptics.

No, no, just kidding…

You’re killin’ me here, Allah.

I hate it when you do this, about as much as I hate surprise birthday parties.

Lawrence on March 22, 2007 at 11:37 AM

Thompson is talking basic common sense…

Which is so unusual now in our society that we are no longer used to it.

Easy to listen to, easy to understand..

Shame common sense isn’t common anymore.

Romeo13 on March 22, 2007 at 11:40 AM

The more I hear from Fred Thompson I more I like him. What a refreshing change. Common sense in plain language. The question is will he run for president?

omegaram on March 22, 2007 at 11:45 AM

I understand the mischievious pleasure of this sort of joke, but I wasted 10 minutes I otherwise wouldn’t have by first being distracted by the headline. then reading the post to see what the last name of this Fred was, and then puzzling why it wasn’t there and then figuring out it was some sort of joke (but since I didn’t check the links I have no idea what the joke is).

These jokes just make this blog more effort to parse than is neccesary

VinceP1974 on March 22, 2007 at 11:55 AM

Then you wonder why some people think this site might be better off without you.

Maxx on March 22, 2007 at 11:25 AM

Lighten up Francis, it was a joke. And just who are these ‘some people’…

dalewalt on March 22, 2007 at 12:01 PM

My first reaction……….

“NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

After realizing your humor:

“Well played, sir!”

PinkyBigglesworth on March 22, 2007 at 12:06 PM

You know – you probably shouldn’t do crap like this. Yes, it was funny. But maybe not all that smart.

I don’t read every thread. I just read the headline and sighed in disgust. It wouldn’t surprise me if yet another Republican stopped thinking and swallowed the Kool-Aid. I just sighed and clicked to the next story.

A couple hours later, I finally came back and read the thread. And was very relieved to find your joke.

But a lot of people will read just the headline and go on thinking Thompson is another global warming nut case. Hell, reading just the headlines is what most people do – which is why the MSM buries the good facts on paragraph 22.

I know you’re amused and all – but maybe a “just kidding” in the headline? A winking smiley face?

Professor Blather on March 22, 2007 at 12:06 PM

Headline jokes are fine… as long as the punchline is in the front page lede. Having to click through to the punchline turns it from a joke into vandalism. Bad form.

huckleberry on March 22, 2007 at 12:08 PM

I was going to say that AP was doing his Drudge imitation, but I don’t want to start another pissing contest …

thirteen28 on March 22, 2007 at 12:10 PM

You Bastid!

R D on March 22, 2007 at 12:13 PM

I think there should be a new segment on HotAir for AP’s little jokes like this.

Holla’ at Allah

Eventually, Fred will say something liberal and you’ll post it and we won’t believe you.

I’m so mad I’m going to go out and kill some trees.

Nethicus on March 22, 2007 at 12:15 PM

I’m so mad I’m going to go out and kill some trees.

Nethicus on March 22, 2007 at 12:15 PM

I’ll give you a coupon for Arby’s curly fries if you’ll spare one of those trees. I drove a lot this week, so I sorta need the offset …

Sorry. Never mind.

Professor Blather on March 22, 2007 at 12:16 PM

Fred Thompson IS interesting. Not only conservative, but has some star power that is so needed to beat Hillary or Obama.

I’ll be watching closely.

Rightwingsparkle on March 22, 2007 at 12:17 PM

Sean Hannity’s who would you vote for poll has Fred at 53% against the rest of em’ You can spike the poll further here: http://www.hannity.com/ (left side 1/4 way down)

The draft fred site is here: http://www.fred08.com/home.html

You can also go home at 2:00 today and watch Fred on TNT.

Fill your life with Fred. That has a nice ring, “President Fred”

Notice that Sean Hannity does not even include Duncan Hunter or Tom Tancredo. Rockefellar Republican exposed

ScottyDog on March 22, 2007 at 12:19 PM

Rudy’s ferret rant actually endears me to him.

lol

csdeven on March 22, 2007 at 12:21 PM

Heh, good job Allah.

Bad Candy on March 22, 2007 at 12:31 PM

Rudy’s ferret rant actually endears me to him.

lol

Same here. Was that Richard Gere on the phone or something? The guy’s unnatural obsession with ferrets was disturbing.

lorien1973 on March 22, 2007 at 12:33 PM

The ol’ Charlie Brown and kicking the ball trick.

right2bright on March 22, 2007 at 12:41 PM

Allah, you’re a sick puppy, you really are. Toying with your faithful like that…

dalewalt on March 22, 2007 at 11:13 AM

Sounds like you might be one of them dalewalt.

Maxx on March 22, 2007 at 12:47 PM

Yeah. Believed that headline for about a micro second.

frankj on March 22, 2007 at 12:47 PM

AP, you’re becoming a bit predictable.

Mojave Mark on March 22, 2007 at 1:19 PM

Dinnerjacket – 5’5 (maybe), not fed.
Kim Great Leader – 5’4 (maybe) Cap’n Crunch fed
Fred – 6’6 (calibrated) Corn fed
Photo op….priceless

Limerick on March 22, 2007 at 1:20 PM

He’s starting to wear on you? I just had multiple orgasms!

Jim-Rose on March 22, 2007 at 1:29 PM

Sounds like you might be one of them dalewalt.

Maxx on March 22, 2007 at 12:47 PM

Which, the faithful or the sick puppy? (I’ve been accused of both :-)

dalewalt on March 22, 2007 at 1:32 PM

Which, the faithful or the sick puppy? (I’ve been accused of both :-)

Can we vote?

:-)

Slublog on March 22, 2007 at 1:37 PM

Can we vote?

Yes, but only once, unless you’re a Dem.

dalewalt on March 22, 2007 at 1:38 PM

Haha…watch it, or someone might slash your tires.

Slublog on March 22, 2007 at 1:44 PM

I’m not sure what’s funnier…the joke, or the thought of AP sitting in front of his computer in his bathrobe, cackling at our shock and horror.

Slublog on March 22, 2007 at 11:19 AM

Come on now, AP has aready told us he blogs without the bathrobe. But you’re gettin’ to deep in the weeds for me.

KelliD on March 22, 2007 at 1:49 PM

Thanks for reminding me KelliD, now I’ve gotta start the counseling all over again

dalewalt on March 22, 2007 at 1:52 PM

Come on now, AP has aready told us he blogs without the bathrobe. But you’re gettin’ to deep in the weeds for me.

Oh, great. You know, those sorts of comments should be reserved for the evening, when we can all hit the bottle in a desperate attempt to erase the horror from our minds.

Slublog on March 22, 2007 at 1:54 PM

Allah, you SUCK!!
That was cruel and uncalled for…and I guess, funny.

;o)

tickleddragon on March 22, 2007 at 2:00 PM

AP, do you print out the comments from a gotcha like this and frame them, or just carve a notch in your monitor?

Yesterday we were clubbing cute polar bears, today you stomp on the little tender green sprout of our hope in Fred.

I’m avoiding HA tomorrow just for my own good.

TexasDan on March 22, 2007 at 2:16 PM

I hate you.

triple on March 22, 2007 at 2:33 PM

Unintended consequence – I’m now reading the voice of Allahpundit with that Queens accent of the Trumpster.
Always amazing that New Yorkers comically think that others sound funny.
Parochial pukes.

Stephen M on March 22, 2007 at 2:58 PM

OK, Allahpundit, you got me. I admit it. I’m gullible. And it’s not even April 1… you’re ten freaking days early!

As for his down-home nature, you should have heard him before he served time in Washington, when he was campaigning for Senator from TN. Man, that accent of his was syrupy thick. The accent has dulled some, but his manner of speaking otherwise hasn’t changed one bit. Then as now, he’s grandpa, and it’s storytime for the kids.

As best I can tell, based on history, we’re getting the real thing. He’s not acting any more now than he was then. Then again, we have established that I am gullible.

flutejpl on March 22, 2007 at 2:59 PM

Ugh…not cool…not cool….don’t scare me like that.

Davalf on March 22, 2007 at 3:12 PM

Totally got me, stomach dropped, thought “guess I don’t have a candidate after all”. That down-home talk can never wear on me, I could listen to that man all day.

Karol on March 22, 2007 at 3:40 PM

Come on now, AP has aready told us he blogs without the bathrobe.
KelliD on March 22, 2007 at 1:49 PM

Oh hell no!

csdeven on March 22, 2007 at 3:43 PM

I knew something didn’t look right. Have Fred agree with the Goracle? At this stage of the game? Either the headline was in error or it was a joke of some sort. I wuz right!

As for the Mitt Romney comment about the poll. I disagree with Allah. I believe the poll says much more about Fred since he isn’t running (yet) and is spending his campaign dollars to get these favorable reviews from the public so early into the game. What, like 3 or 4 weeks now?

I bet if Fred does run he’ll be remembered as the candidate who raised the most cash in the shortest amount of time with the least of work needed to get the job done. Better than Deano but he’ll spend it wisely and smartly instead.

Kokonut on March 22, 2007 at 4:00 PM

Money line:

There’s a consensus. Just ask Galileo.

I think I’m gonna make a bumper sticker out of that one.

The Monster on March 22, 2007 at 4:08 PM

Come on now, AP has aready told us he blogs without the bathrobe.
KelliD on March 22, 2007 at 1:49 PM

Allah, we barely knew you ;)

http://www.ssqq.com/romance/images/fat%20guy.jpg

lorien1973 on March 22, 2007 at 4:32 PM

Yeah, Yeah, AllahP. Misleading headlines are all fun and games until someone dies from it.

On a daily basis lately, not only is the duct tape around my head weakening; my blood pressure is high and chest pains barely controlled; Plus, I had a.45 in Condition 1 inches away when I read that headline.

I’m leaving the cops and my lawyer a note to check out your posts if I die.

LegendHasIt on March 22, 2007 at 4:44 PM

Oh, great. You know, those sorts of comments should be reserved for the evening, when we can all hit the bottle in a desperate attempt to erase the horror from our minds.

Hey, man…like the song goes, it’s 5:00 somewhere.

fusionaddict on March 22, 2007 at 5:49 PM

Bad jokes aside, Fred is the best candidate that the Republicans can field. If he runs, he will win in 2008 but he needs to start running now!

duff65 on March 22, 2007 at 6:07 PM

A pox upon you, Allah. May you fester in the bowels of old comment hell for this.

PattyAnn on March 22, 2007 at 7:46 PM

All I can say is I do not wanna be one to give the Baby Earth it’s thermometer.

- The Cat

MirCat on March 22, 2007 at 8:37 PM

AP,

If I ever meet you, I’ll kick your arse for that heart attack I got from your title.

Go Fred/Watts ’08!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tim Burton on March 22, 2007 at 10:21 PM

AP,

If I ever meet you, I’ll kick your arse for that heart attack I got from your title.

Tim Burton on March 22, 2007 at 10:21 PM

Dittos that. I am starting, if not already, to hate AP and his titles and pandering – He said it himself that he is a panderer.

Anyhow, to the point. Gore’s a FUH KING idiot. Can I say that??? How different is it than using astericks such as F*cking???

The real question that should have been asked of Gore,”King of the Fuh’s”, during his Senate showboat is: If everyone followed his example, instead of following his enviromania preaching, and had $3000 a month electricity bills, but say it’s okay because one is carbon neutral due to carbon offsets, Would the planet be better off – or worse off???. I mean, does he really believe that by being “carbon neutral” absolves him of being more responsible for the death of planet earth than the average household, or two, or three, or four???

Not that I believe this whoey, just see what his answer would be. Like the post yesterday, IT IS THE SUN, man.

LurP on March 23, 2007 at 1:27 AM

I wish Al Gore would say that it’s HELL that started Global Warming. Hollywood would become a Christian Commune overnight.

GoodBoy on March 23, 2007 at 1:42 AM

Not funny.

LonelyMassRepublican on March 23, 2007 at 6:01 AM

Only two things kept me from being among the shocked/angered over the early 4/1 bit. One, after your last lying headline about Tanc, I could see it coming a mile away. Two, I listen to Paul Harvey’s news and commentary every day, so I heard Fred’s slam today on the Goracle and anthropogenic warming.

Let’s see:
– An experienced lawyer, who also happens to play one on TV
– Responsible for the question “What did he know, and when did he know it?” (Asked regarding President Nixon during the Watergate investigation)
– Pulled down Tennessee Governor Ray Blanton for selling prison pardons, the story becoming a movie in which he played himself, launching his acting career
– A successful term-plus as Senator from Tennessee, during which he gave the Republican response to the SOTU address from Billy-Jeff in 1994
– Maintained a solidly conservative voting record on all major issues throughout his time in the Senate
– Unmatched name recognition due to his multi-layered celebrity status
– Speaks clearly, honestly, and in favor of the foundational rule of law upon which the U.S. was built and made great
– Actually believes that the 2nd, 4th, 10th, and 14th amendments mean exactly what they are written to say

He just might be the real deal.

Freelancer on March 23, 2007 at 7:37 AM