If you answer is yes to any of the following questions (or for the heck of it, even if you say no) go to Iowahawk to find out what you can do:

Are you concerned that your profligate personal lifestyle is harming the environment? Losing sleep over the long-term ecological damage resulting from those greenhouse gases constantly emitted by your family, your cars, your pets, and your shrubbery? Do you want to become carbon-neutral, but just don’t know how?

Well rejoice, sinner! Carbon atonement is no longer the exclusive preserve of the Malibu set — with the Iowahawk EcoPals Network! This unique new system lets you, the average Joe planet rapist, cleanse your tortured psyche of the stain of enviro-guilt for as little as $9.95 per year! If enough of you follow this simple three step program, we can save the world for our children — who will soon be frolicking with healthy polar bears atop Earth’s reforested glaciers. Act now before it’s too late!

And don’t forget to pick out a slogan:

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