Mocking Mohammed

posted at 5:10 pm on February 26, 2007 by Bryan

Hoo-boy, somebody’s going to lose their head over this.

Iranian MPs have demanded an apology from President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad after teachers were given government-sponsored tests deemed “insulting” to the prophet Muhammad.

What, did Mahmoud write the questions?

The exam – sat by teachers seeking promotion – provoked outrage by posing questions which appeared to degrade Islam’s holiest figure by alluding to personal habits and proclivities. Most of the 40 multiple-choice questions have been judged so mocking that Iran’s state-controlled media has refrained from publishing them.

One less offensive question, reproduced by local newspapers and websites, lists four choices when asking how Muhammad compared himself with the prophet Joseph. They are: “A) I am more beautiful than Joseph; B) Joseph is more beautiful than me; C) I am cuter than Joseph; D) Joseph is more beautiful than me but I am cuter than him.” Others refer to his hair and beard colour.

Some MPs branded the incident a deliberate plot to undermine Iran’s Islamic system and likened it to last year’s row over Danish cartoons satirising Muhammad, which provoked outrage throughout the Muslim world after they were published in several European newspapers.

If the point was to make them all look like medieval idiots, mission accomplished!


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Score one for the CIA!

Anil Petra on February 26, 2007 at 5:12 PM

Islam is to progress as…

(a) Water is to fire
(b) Garlic is to vampires
(c) Chicago Cubs are to World Series Championship
(d) All of the above

flipflop on February 26, 2007 at 5:14 PM

Karl Rove, you magnificent bastard….

Mallard T. Drake on February 26, 2007 at 5:17 PM

Ahmadinajambajuice better watch his step now.

thirteen28 on February 26, 2007 at 5:19 PM

Someone here does this they get a 60Minutes interview. There the interview probably lasts a tad bit longer. Whoever published the test questions needs to get the Medal of Freedom.

Limerick on February 26, 2007 at 5:20 PM

D. All of the above… can I be a Islamocrat now??

Viper1 on February 26, 2007 at 5:27 PM

Sounds like the guy who wrote Heather Has Two Mommies is moonlighting as an Iranian test writer.

Iblis on February 26, 2007 at 5:34 PM

So many exit question possibilities. So little time.

shaken on February 26, 2007 at 5:40 PM

Seriously, I think this may be an indication that a lot of Iranians, especially the educated ones, are very pro-western. My main reason for opposing an all out attack on Iran. And if we do use limited strikes, we need to be very careful not to alienate pro-western supporters.

csdeven on February 26, 2007 at 5:48 PM

Seriously, I think this may be an indication that a lot of Iranians, especially the educated ones, are very pro-western. My main reason for opposing an all out attack on Iran. And if we do use limited strikes, we need to be very careful not to alienate pro-western supporters.

csdeven on February 26, 2007 at 5:48 PM

Even better, I prefer the Michael Ledeen foment-a-revolution-from-within approach. I don’t know if our government is doing anything on that front, but if they aren’t, they should be, and if they are, they should be doing more.

thirteen28 on February 26, 2007 at 6:03 PM

And if we do use limited strikes, we need to be very careful not to alienate pro-western supporters.

csdeven on February 26, 2007 at 5:48 PM

Especially the cute ones.

infidel4life on February 26, 2007 at 6:05 PM

Cue the rabid hordes rioting in the streets being all offended….

G-man on February 26, 2007 at 6:09 PM

infidel4life on February 26, 2007 at 6:05 PM

I like that idea! Unless they build nukes here, we should be able to save the cuties.

csdeven on February 26, 2007 at 7:02 PM

Whispering to the camera: “We’re here at a fancy Iranian high school where we’ve secretly switched the text books with Robert Spencer’s ‘The Truth About Muhammed’. Let’s watch and see what happens.”

Tony737 on February 26, 2007 at 7:04 PM

That careerbuilder.com superbowl ad picture is just too perfect… Whoz Cuter?

Mazztek on February 26, 2007 at 7:23 PM

Which was the correct answer?

bloggless on February 26, 2007 at 8:14 PM

Optional test Questions-

1. In Bukhari’s Hadith 2;26;666, who did the prophet say would “tear down the Ka’aba, brick by brick“:

A) a fat-faced commuter from Cairo.
B) a skinny-legged black man from Ethiopia
C) a crossed-eyed geek from Dubuque
D) a snot-nosed mullah from Qom.

2. When your wives are menstruating, did the prophet say you should:

A) avoid them like the plague
B) tickle their fancy with a camel’s tail
C) only fondle their breasts
D) go pound sand

The Hadiths are so chock full o’ such nuts that any test, if strictly based on the queasy quirks of Mohammad, would seem more like the world’s first Islamic joke book than the accepted tenets of a serious “religion”.

Extra credit essay topic:

Why did the prophet dye his beard henna color?

profitsbeard on February 26, 2007 at 10:06 PM

The test posed questions on the minutiae of the prophet Muhammad’s life, including:

God’s prophet never ate food with

a) Two fingers
b) Three fingers
c) Four fingers
d) Five fingers
e) The Hand that he used to wipe himself with?

I never knew the Teacher’s Unions were on our side of the War on Terror………. Keep up the good work!

PinkyBigglesworth on February 26, 2007 at 10:21 PM

Gotta feel for those teachers. When I tested for my master’s license, there was a RIGHT answer, a WRONG answer, and there was the COAST GUARD answer.

These guys must have been busting ice picks through their skulls. More power to ‘em.

PS: I take answer “e” in the above comment. Yeesh.

wccawa on February 26, 2007 at 10:34 PM

item 25) Which of these is not consistent with the others?

(a) Islam: Death
(b) Islam: Destruction
(c) Islam: Desolation
(d) Islam: Dhimmitude
(e) Islam: Dismemberment

Please take your time.

Mojave Mark on February 27, 2007 at 12:50 AM

Bonus Question:

Which “Doom” is the “Doom” of “Dooms”………

A) Painful Doom

B) Evil Doom

C) Dreadful Doom

D) Heavy Doom

E) “Enter your Doom here” Doom

Winner will be awarded extra virgins by Allah……

PinkyBigglesworth on February 27, 2007 at 3:00 AM

Q: How many muslims does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Two. One to change the light bulb, and one to kill everyone in the room.

JackM on February 27, 2007 at 10:26 AM

Chop Chop.

shooter on February 27, 2007 at 2:47 PM