PJM: Khamenei hospitalized, condition unknown
posted at 2:15 am on December 7, 2006 by Allahpundit
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It’s Michael Ledeen, putting some meat on the bone after he floated this a few days ago at the Corner sans details:
Three days ago, Iran’s dictator, Supreme Leader Ayatollah ali Khamenei, was rushed to the vast medical facility traditionally known as “Vanak” hospital (it now has an Arabic name that means “the 12th Imam Hospital”), a 1,200-room facility that saves half of its beds for the leadership.
Khamenei is known to be suffering from cancer, and taking considerable quantities of an opium-based pain killer…
Khamenei is still undergoing tests and receiving maximum attention. It is clearly a serious problem because he wanted to leave the hospital, only to be talked out of it by the doctors. The precise gravity of his condition is not known, but the argument over the wisdom of moving him to his own home suggests it may be quite serious.
My sources for this information are a very knowledgeable Iranian cleric plus another Iranian who has previously provided strikingly accurate stories from the highest levels of the regime in Tehran, suggesting that a major crisis may be underway in Iran.
Big news, as whether or not Iran becomes fully “Ahmadinejadized” will depend on who succeeds Khamenei. The leading candidates include Mahdi’s archrival, Rafsanjani, and his “spiritual mentor,” Mesbah-Yazdi, a hardcore jihadist nut who’s bestowed Koranic sanction on slavery and the use of nuclear weapons, among other things. I say again: the use of nuclear weapons. Not just their construction and stockpiling.
Think of him as the Emperor Palpatine to Ahmadinejad’s Vader. And, I guess, Rafsanjani as Jabba the Hutt. He’s a plutocrat who topped the list of Forbes’s millionaire mullahs back in 2003, so there’s at least a chance of him behaving rationally as supreme leader. Mesbah-Yazdi, by contrast, is rumored to belong to the Hojjatieh Society, a secretive messianic Shiite cult within Iran that believes the return of the 12th imam is imminent. He denies it, but that’s to be expected: Khomeini himself banned the Society in 1983, so even members of the ruling elite would be leery about advertising their association with it.
Long story short, if Khamenei kicks and the nuts consolidate power, Jim Baker’s dream of a grand bargain will explode like the Death Star. A different approach will be required.
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Allah make Star Wars funny. Me laugh. And fortunately I’m a girl so I get a pass on proving I’m a normal person rather than an unqualified geek.
Anwyn on December 7, 2006 at 2:32 AM
Okay. If he’s going to die soon anyway, better to have it happen now, or well before their go-live date next March, so that Baker & Co. are faced some “clarity” about the way things will be.
RD on December 7, 2006 at 2:43 AM
I still see the President as more of a Gary Cooper in High Noon.
John Kerry imagines himself as the Han Solo that does not shoot first….
rw on December 7, 2006 at 2:47 AM
Is a civil war too much to hope for?
bdfaith on December 7, 2006 at 2:51 AM
I actually understand things better when put in the context of Star Wars. Hopefully, Allah will do the same with the russian spy story.
Scot on December 7, 2006 at 3:01 AM
Funny, while chasing a link on the Gates confirmation where he pooh-poohed the idea of Ahmadinejad breaking free from the poobah clerics and acting out some of his more profane ideas, I was thinking of the ages of the poobahs. Now I’m not employing the tired x = Nazis canard but Hitler did have to operate behind the figure of Ludendorf(right?) and made his real claim on power after the old man’s death.
thegreatbeast on December 7, 2006 at 3:02 AM
When Israel goes up in a series of mushroom clouds, the peaceniks and the “make-nice-with-Iran” club
is just going to blame Bush for “provoking Iran” anyway.
Just sit back and wait for it to happen, nobody but Israel has a dog in this fight due to the Democrats and the Sheehan types.
quax1 on December 7, 2006 at 3:24 AM
Really.. no one has said it yet? Okay - I question the timing.
RightWinged on December 7, 2006 at 3:29 AM
Must resist the temptation. ;)
F15Mech on December 7, 2006 at 4:30 AM
…Well, I’m here to tell you that you’re probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you’re not gonna amount to Jack Squat!!” You’re gonna end up eating a steady diet of government cheese, and living in a van down by the river!
RIP Chris Farley
F15Mech on December 7, 2006 at 4:55 AM
Allah et all,
Please delete my last post.
It is in the wrong thread.
F15Mech on December 7, 2006 at 4:58 AM
Laugh Factory owner, Jamie Masada, is originally from Iran so I guess that would make him the R2D2 of this saga.
pjcomix on December 7, 2006 at 5:13 AM
bdfaith,
It’s the Worst. Thing. Ever. A quagmire! A failed strategy! We’ll be in dire straits! It’s defeat! Muslims killing Muslims demonstrates that America is a crumbling power, on it’s way to the dustbin of history. This would be an unmitigated catastrophe of proportions heretofore unheard of! It will be almost as bad as Katrina! It will be the end of Democracy itself! It will go down as the end of an empire and Bush will be recorded as the man who caused America’s final fall into shame and irrelevance.
Oh, wait. You’re talking about Iran, aren’t you? That’s probably the same thing, but somehow it doesn’t seem that way. Let’s keep an eye on the Today Show, and perhaps Matt Lauer will tell us.
Pablo on December 7, 2006 at 5:40 AM
Then Rudi Bahktiar must be Princess Leia. Which brings out the Skywalker in me.
Pablo on December 7, 2006 at 6:02 AM
Where’s Obi-Wan Kenobi when you need him?
Jezla on December 7, 2006 at 6:35 AM
Let’s watch and see if this one can actually stay inside his casket this time.
Hey, maybe Ahmajama had him poisoned after hearing that his term was gonna be cut short. Perhaps the old man had the sushi?
Tony737 on December 7, 2006 at 7:50 AM
It was all that damn meat!
bloggless on December 7, 2006 at 7:58 AM
He did on June 5, 2004.
looking4statesmen on December 7, 2006 at 8:00 AM
Please substitute “did” with “died.”
Sorry. Forgot how to spell.
looking4statesmen on December 7, 2006 at 8:02 AM
At the risk of being slapped around by AP…
Who in the heck do we have to @#$% to drop a nuke on these people?
1) They are killing Americans in Iraq
2) They are undermining the government in Lebanon.
3) They are backing the terrorists and stirring up sectarian violence in Iraq.
4) They are building nuclear weapons, and have showing a willingness to use them on Israel.
If Bill O’Reilly got one thing right last night, it was that this Iraq survey group should of been called the Iran survey group.
Iraq is the front, but the real enemy we are fighting at the moment is Iran.
E L Frederick (Sniper One) on December 7, 2006 at 8:04 AM
Belated congratulations, tony 737.
The mullah just saved the cost of one .50 cal round, IMHO.
tormod on December 7, 2006 at 8:11 AM
What did I say? Rove is a genius!
Ropera on December 7, 2006 at 8:29 AM
Did he have the pulled pork chalupa with green onions???
seejanemom on December 7, 2006 at 8:35 AM
Probably Bush’s fault too!
Golfer_75093 on December 7, 2006 at 9:01 AM
Maybe the thought of Ahmadinejad watching the dancers was too much for him.
jman on December 7, 2006 at 9:04 AM
ROFL. This reeks of dictatorship death talk. Arafat is in stable condition…Castro is perfectly healthy…
I love it.
WriterMom on December 7, 2006 at 9:48 AM
I QUESTION HIS LIFE EXPECTANCY!
AND HIS GLASSES! GOOD LORD DID HE GET THOSE AT K-MART!
natesnake on December 7, 2006 at 9:52 AM
Lord, have mercy. When I read this, I felt a small thrill. Say it with me now, “Schadenfreude!” I love yiddish at the expense of POS’s like this.
And BTW, all he had was the (Polonium) falafel…
urbancenturion on December 7, 2006 at 10:12 AM
phhhheeeewwwwtttt …..
I just blew coffee on the monitor … Heh. I remember the last one. On the tube it looked like a swarm of ants fighting over a leaf.
AZ_Redneck on December 7, 2006 at 10:52 AM
Personally, I flashed back to the ’70’s and the reports on Francisco Franco on Saturday Night Live (back when it was funny):
“It has been announced by the Supreme Information Council of the Islamic Revolutionary Council of Angelic Cultural Oppression, that today, according to latest reports, Supreme Leader Ayatollah ali Khamenei, peace be upon him, is valiantly fighting to remain dead. More news as this story unfolds. Back to you, Ali-Akbar.”
Puritan1648 on December 7, 2006 at 11:51 AM
I’ve learned to explain the world we live in to my two sons by blending a mix of Bible prophecy and Star Wars. Might actually make a good book come to think of it. Sort of like “The Gospel According to Peanuts” for sci-fi fans.
CliffHanger on December 7, 2006 at 12:54 PM
And for those of you who can remember that far back… “President Andropov has a cold.”
Gotta love that totalitarian doublespeak.
Dinsdale Piranha on December 7, 2006 at 1:01 PM
How do you say “polonium” in Farsi?
(I’m waiting to hear about his deathbed conversion to Zoroastrianism.)
profitsbeard on December 7, 2006 at 3:07 PM
Thanks tormod! BabyGirl737 is doin’ great. Little poop-machine!
Tony737 on December 7, 2006 at 3:15 PM
Personally, I’m glad he’s on the way to checking out. But, from the looks of things, his replacement will be much worse.
georgej on December 7, 2006 at 3:41 PM
Dead is dead.
Let’s not look a gift horse in the mouth.
If only the rest of them would form a circle around him and breathe in his putrid body.
accdat on December 7, 2006 at 4:00 PM
Had to restrain him again, did they? Khamenei, we hardly knew ye.
Just die already, ya murderous freak.
Spiny Norman on December 7, 2006 at 4:09 PM
How do you say ‘rigor mortis’ in Farsi is more the question?
WriterMom on December 7, 2006 at 4:13 PM
.
Not to intrude on this thread’s Star Wars motif, thegreatbeast, but you mean Hindenburg, the President of Germany for the first year and a half of Nazi rule until he died in the Summer of 1934. In your analogy, who’s Hitler now?
Janos Hunyadi on December 7, 2006 at 5:33 PM
= Allah-el-stiff
Ropera on December 7, 2006 at 10:36 PM