Mark your calendars: Peaceniks call for global orgasm on December 22nd
posted at 12:15 am on November 20, 2006 by Allahpundit
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To jam the Islamofascist hate signal? To rain love vibes down on Darfur? To melt the icy heart of Kim Jong-Il with pure, concentrated bliss?
Nah. To stop Bush from attacking Iran:
WHY? To effect positive change in the energy field of the Earth through input of the largest possible surge of human energy a Synchronized Global Orgasm. There are two more US fleets heading for the Persian Gulf with anti-submarine equipment that can only be for use against Iran, so the time to change Earth’s energy is NOW!
So. Who’s in?
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Oh, well it all makes perfect sense now. Just one big global orgasm and the world will be fine. Order will be restored! No more war, starvation, poverty, or anything else. Just bask in the afterglow and think “good thoughts”. Why didn’t we think of this years ago. I don’t know about you folks, but there’s nothing like a good orgasm to make me forget about all my problems. Dear God! Why didn’t I embrace liberalism years ago!
thedecider on November 20, 2006 at 12:25 AM
That video was… what would you say… retarded.
zerodamage on November 20, 2006 at 12:26 AM
I must be one seriously sick puppy. My orgasm is timed with the launch of all the torpedos and missiles in the fleet.
laelaps on November 20, 2006 at 12:29 AM
And some people want to say this is a news site rather than a blog. I submit Exhibit O.
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 12:35 AM
Make
orgasmlove not war.Also, what would Freud say to this “global orgasm”?
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 12:37 AM
Also, I thought the Lefties hate globalisation (I spelled it the British way on purpose)…
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 12:39 AM
Hey Entelechy! Been a while.
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 12:39 AM
Oh no no. Lefties LOVE globalization as long as the labor unions don’t complain about it. Then they’re totally against it.
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 12:40 AM
Freud? We should probably as Art Bell.
laelaps on November 20, 2006 at 12:43 AM
“as” should be “ask”
laelaps on November 20, 2006 at 12:44 AM
Hi Anwyn, I missed you too. The addition of many commenters (no complaints about it), many more threads, many business trips, and more trolls, have taken some of the ‘old’ interactions out. We must adapt or retreat.
I had asked you at the time of the airplane accident if you’re a pilot. I’m one and liked your commenting on the topic. Now, how to knit it into this topic? :)
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 12:45 AM
How about we simotainiously abduct every cleric,imam and confisate all copies of the koran world wide. Then I might have an orgasm! About the music video, I still find that song Eleanor Rigby haunting. From the first time I heard it in 67-68 whatever, it made me think about the unpopular people who were rejected by society. I don’t know why, it made me examine my own self seeking interests, and have compasion for others. Sometimes I think I was the one that needed to be looked upon with compassion. Well thats life I guess. The genius of the young mind of Mcartney still blows me away. He was probably 21 years old when he wrote that.
sonnyspats1 on November 20, 2006 at 12:45 AM
Troll Grebrook is already signed up as a one-handed participant
Janos Hunyadi on November 20, 2006 at 12:45 AM
That’s hilarious! Here’s Come Together (Aerosmith version) just for the hell of it. Anybody remember the movie this is from?
Scot on November 20, 2006 at 12:46 AM
We should at least send Art Bell the link. He’ll make an entire Coast-to-Coast about it. Art Bell ALONE can command legions to orgasm simuletaneously.
laelaps on November 20, 2006 at 12:48 AM
Entelechy, Szia , kedves , hogy van?
Janos Hunyadi on November 20, 2006 at 12:52 AM
Entelechy, I’ve taken a few lessons but let it go idle when I had my son. I plan to get my license one day. My father is a retired career air force and airline pilot. And yeah, influx of new commenters and my own blogging, among other things, means less commenting for me. Religious about reading, though, as always.
Eyeing Allah tentatively now, as I offer external links: I blog both at http://www.anwyn.com and at Electric Venom, http://www.electricvenom.com, if you want to come by to chat. :)
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 12:53 AM
Eeewww. I can see some of you doing it.
What do you expect? Tying sex to an issue is not new. Advertisement use it to get our attention.
Ouabam on November 20, 2006 at 1:01 AM
I will Anwyn – checked out your first site but didn’t know about the second. Allah can just assume that we’re “coming together”. Isn’t that what the thread is all about? Gosh, next think we know, they’ll start a rumor about us. All. in. the. name. of. peace :)
Janos, I’m fine and I always read your comments. You have a ’strange’ mind, like all Hungarians. I read books about that :) I don’t know Hungarian. Here is, however, a great link for more unusual translations. AP, consider this part of the “global orgasm”.
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 1:01 AM
s/b “next thing we know…”
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 1:04 AM
Hahaha … that mental image is the price Allah pays for us keeping to the thread. Sort of. I’ll look forward to hearing about your piloting experiences, Entelechy … and yeah, Electric Venom is a new gig, I’m there by the kind invitation of the proprietor, Venomous Kate.
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 1:23 AM
Proprietress? Whatever. :)
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 1:24 AM
My links never work. I wonder what i’m doing wrong? Let’s see if i can get this to work.
Scot on November 20, 2006 at 1:27 AM
I love when the left won’t acknowledge God and the power of prayer.. but call it concentrating “energy” and it’s all good.
RightWinged on November 20, 2006 at 1:34 AM
Right on, RW.
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 1:40 AM
You got it, dude. (From a cartoon)
Ouabam on November 20, 2006 at 1:52 AM
Just in case they might actually have something here …
I suggest every conservative in the country should concentrate every thought immediately after orgasm … on causing all liberals to suffer a massive brain anorism.
It never hurts to cover our bases.
Gregor on November 20, 2006 at 1:55 AM
Hey, if concentrated “energy” can forcibly change the world, why don’t they leave the damned economy alone and use this to fix global warming?
I’m just saying, can’t we use this belief in nonsense to our advantage to get them to lay off some of the more dangerous crap they want to try to “fix problems”?
gekkobear on November 20, 2006 at 2:11 AM
Actually, I believe that’s Michelle from Full House…. I mean… er… yeah, that must be from a cartoon or some show I’ve never heard of….. I gotta go!
RightWinged on November 20, 2006 at 2:15 AM
Remember when they were saying that if all the Chinese stomped at the same time they will be able to change the Earth rotation? Nahhh…you guys are way too young.
Ropera on November 20, 2006 at 2:31 AM
I don’t know, maybe I’m getting soft in my old age, but I really am beginning to appreciate the presence of those simians.
I mean, on one hand they’re both too worthless, cowardly and harmless to be any threat to civilized, intelligent, upright-walking lifeforms and, on the other, the next time the savages attack you can at least fine some modicum of comfort in the knowledge that a percentage of those killed were twits like that and thus absolutely no loss to humanity as a whole.
Misha I on November 20, 2006 at 2:44 AM
A YouTube alternative about coming
laelaps on November 20, 2006 at 3:08 AM
And just when I thought the peace movement had reached its climax here they come and bring it to the next plateau. Now I certainly hope this doesn’t rub folks the wrong way but this may be a stroke of genius; I mean hey, rather than blowing a wad of cash on bombs and bullets, let’s just spend it all on wads of tissue paper.
World Peace, Let’s Get It On.
jasnell on November 20, 2006 at 3:20 AM
So far, I’ve gotten no response from my appeals to the Bush twins to join me in a Threesome for Victory …
Ali-Bubba on November 20, 2006 at 5:02 AM
Ali,
thats because theyre going to be with me..
Viper1 on November 20, 2006 at 5:36 AM
So, will liberal socialist welfare system (AMSOC) provide a free (and acceptable) partner for co-participation in this glorious “peace” demonstration??? If so, I’m IN!!!!
On second thought… The socialist welfare system would pair me with Rotundsie O’Donnel and tell me to do my “duty to the Party.”
Ewww… This imagery is making me vomit…
mojojojo on November 20, 2006 at 7:06 AM
Is faking it acceptable?
mikeyboss on November 20, 2006 at 7:22 AM
Dangit! I can’t participate, Dec. 22nd is not my birthday and she-who-must-be-obeyed doesn’t negotiate that rule!
BacaDog on November 20, 2006 at 7:27 AM
laelaps:
Awesome!
mikeyboss on November 20, 2006 at 7:30 AM
That is my mothers birthday..
the HORROR the HORROR!!!!!
…off to claw my eys out so I’ll never read this again…
CBarker on November 20, 2006 at 8:16 AM
It’s going to come down to the “swing” votes anyway. KP?
RightWinged on November 20, 2006 at 8:29 AM
That’s awesome.
Esthier on November 20, 2006 at 8:45 AM
do you think the world has enough cigarettes to pass out afterwards?
pullingmyhairout on November 20, 2006 at 8:49 AM
I think a collective bowel movement would be more in keeping with their message.
bloggless on November 20, 2006 at 9:11 AM
We need an excuse for sexual relations now?
Well, I guess any excuse is a good one. I don’t think that my endorphine levels are going to make an idota of difference to the world.
Is this from the same guy who started world jump day?
E L Frederick (Sniper One) on November 20, 2006 at 9:38 AM
Dude! They’re going to “measure” the results on a worldwide monitor system! That is sooooo cool.
And really, really, really creepy.
E. M. on November 20, 2006 at 9:40 AM
Who will bring the protection?
infidel on November 20, 2006 at 9:45 AM
They are all a bunch of “jerk offs” anyway.
BobK on November 20, 2006 at 9:48 AM
I’m guessing it’s BYOP.
Esthier on November 20, 2006 at 9:51 AM
Come together.
And some people want to say this is a news site rather than a blog. I submit Exhibit O.
Anwyn on November 20, 2006 at 12:35 AM
Yup, there’s nothing newsworthy about this story at all. No sexual innuendo at all in the Almighty Allah. Now video, that I can get a piece of.
Oops, did I say that out loud again????????
Subsunk
Subsunk on November 20, 2006 at 10:05 AM
So if you have to think about world peace to participate in the “Global O”… what the heck do you think about?
If I have to think about Sheehag while trying to participate… it ain’t happening.
E L Frederick (Sniper One) on November 20, 2006 at 10:25 AM
A Day In The Life of a moonbat.
infidel4life on November 20, 2006 at 11:10 AM
I’m waiting for the press release on Dec 23rd that ackowledges that the event failed due to a large number of premature energy spikes. Of course, they’ll have to try again… a sort of Second Coming if you will.
jasnell on November 20, 2006 at 11:17 AM
Better pay attention to the “human energy” on about December 10th, as most of those twits will be experiencing what is known as PREMATURE EJACULATION.
A month of foreplay? please.
shooter on November 20, 2006 at 11:21 AM
“Where are the
clownstrolls?”What is it with the name Sheehan, lately? Good thing there are so many good ones out there.
While the subject of sex always elicits wit, on this or any other board, seriously, I thought the elite is more sophisticated than this. First the Chinese jumping, then the
…and now this. What’s next? Global hug with a terrorist? Global e
rlection? Global farting? Global cleansing?How about a global stupidity day? Maybe we can get John Kerry to ’slip’ it out as an initiative…
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 12:11 PM
The problem with this is that there’d be no way of differentiating it from any other day.
jasnell on November 20, 2006 at 12:32 PM
i gotta tell you, thinking about peace doesn’t get me off
thinking about a piece might
Global Orgasm for Peace = GOP :-D
Defector01 on November 20, 2006 at 12:46 PM
Sounds like your only participating if you get off while thinking about world peace…
E L Frederick (Sniper One) on November 20, 2006 at 12:57 PM
Come together…
Right now, over – there, somewhere.
mojo on November 20, 2006 at 1:18 PM
…that about wraps it up for me.
A global orgasm? This raises a host of practical questions:
* Who’s arranging for a global mopping detail?
* Do you credit teenage boys at the same level as fully grown married men?
* For those adept at multiple orgasms (Yea, team!), do they get credit for…er…covering the…er…the unavoidable shortfall from…er…those requiring Viagra…so to speak….
* Who will placate the the jihadis, rioting for their having been made to sleep in the wet spot?
* How will we channel this global “energy”? Has someone figured out a way to capture orgasmic energy in a storage batter? Or, are we just supposed to mail the…er…results to a pre-determined address?
* Is this just a ploy by the porn industry to have an “end-of-year” sale?
* If your spouse walks in on you exercising your…er…political commitment, will you get credit for that orgasm or will you have to deduct it from the six months of orgasms you’re bloody well not going to be able to…er..contribute as a result of you being a “pathetic little pervert…my mother warned me about you…you disgusting little blah-blah-blah….”
* Can’t these guys think of anything more mature than this? First they hector the War and all who see its necessity, then they resort to this? Can we hunt down those who support it and unmercifully rib them, pointing out that they may not be serious stewards of the public weal after all?
…you always should look not only to intentions, but to execution, if you wish to prevail. It pays to be practical.
Puritan1648 on November 20, 2006 at 1:37 PM
LOL!!!
Yakko77 on November 20, 2006 at 1:40 PM
I just visited their page, http://www.globalorgasm.org/ and on the left just blow the navigations there are “what, when , why,” etc. and just below that is….. A DONATION BUTTON.
Ok we’ve sent bricks, printed Bush pesos, but I don’t know if I can do this donation.
Oh well, if they really want it, I’ll go get some baggies and a stamp…..or maybe lots of stamps.
shooter on November 20, 2006 at 2:22 PM
Someone call Al Gore – it might be a good source for alternative energy. And a new source for taxes?
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 2:27 PM
Just more of their “if it feels good, do it” mentality I guess. Maybe they can get, um, hand…outs from the government?
Anyway, I thought they were already orgasmic over control of the house and senate.
eucher on November 20, 2006 at 2:38 PM
…when in doubt, first and always focus on how things effect MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Puritan1648 on November 20, 2006 at 2:47 PM
*rummage-rummage*
*shouts* “Tipper! Tiiiiippppppeerrrrr! Have you seen my ball peen? The Internet’s running slow, and I need to adjust the bandwidth….”
“Al…there’s a man at the door. He says that he’s driving a truck *FULL* of…er…well…bottles…which he says are full of…er…*whispers* love minnows. He says that he has instructions to deliver…er…them to youm that you’re supposed to figure out some sort of storage…thing…for…them….”
“Ah! The shipment! This means world peace, old girl! Have the nice man back up and put the bottles on the porch.”
“…ah…”
*returns to front door”
“My husband says that you’re to drop them off on the porch. Back up over there, and I’ll unroll the awning. Wouldn’t want any of them to sit all day in the sun…and…er…spoil….”
*Servers around the world all simultaneously fail.*
Puritan1648 on November 20, 2006 at 2:59 PM
No, really, this can work. It’s well known that men are more violent than women. And this will provide at least an eight hour respite from violence, because after they participate in this project, the men will all be asleep and thus no danger to anyone.
Laura on November 20, 2006 at 3:07 PM
Laura, I loved the title “Puerile Public Political Prattle” on your site.
“Excuse me Sir, do you own this restaurant?”
“No, I don’t”
“Then stfu so the rest of us can dine in peace”
Easier said/written than done…
Entelechy on November 20, 2006 at 3:38 PM
Will abortions spike during the 9 months after this as well?
lorien1973 on November 20, 2006 at 3:47 PM
Sure! Here’s your partner, provided by the munificent left.
Random Numbers (Brian Epps) on November 20, 2006 at 4:06 PM
My birthday!!
You shouldn’t have….no, really, you shouldn’t have
TBinSTL on November 20, 2006 at 5:54 PM
I must say I really liked the acoustic guitar playing on their site, wish I knew who is was. But I’ve already had my orgasm this year.
Maxx on November 20, 2006 at 6:08 PM
Just for good measure… “We have the answer, Baby“
Editor on November 20, 2006 at 6:41 PM
Thanks, Entelechy! I was so, so tempted to tell him exactly that. If my husband had not been with me, I probably would have, but the idiot was so fired up, I worried he’d say something obnoxious to me and my husband would have felt called upon to, um, convince him of the error of his ways. No fair for me to pick a fight that he’ll feel obligated to finish. :-)
Laura on November 20, 2006 at 6:50 PM
Hummm … I question the timing.. ;)
Texas Gal on November 20, 2006 at 6:55 PM
The heck with the orgasm, lets just light the cigarrette.
gary on November 20, 2006 at 7:18 PM
Uh-oh, this is scheduled only 9 days before the Islamic holiday, Eid al-Adha (Festival of Sacrifice) on 12/31/06. Yikes, that could be a public relations nightmare.
And besides, if we produce this powerful surge of sexual electricity ALL IN ONE DAY, aren’t we likely to increase global temperatures, which will then kill the planet? (not to mention a few old hippies — oops, can’t quite do THAT position anymore) Yet, if we produce this rainbow of peace and love and harmony, in its purest form (ie, with folk music in the background), we can actually eliminate weapons of mass destruction!
What to do, what to do …
eucher on November 20, 2006 at 11:12 PM
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