Alternate headline: “Israel wins.” Believe it or not, this really does qualify as news, for one reason and one reason only. Where are the Coldplay fans in the audience? Hands up.

Anyone?

International music sensations Coldplay made headlines in Israel on Wednesday by passively endorsing a musical initiative by group OneWorld, called “Freedom for Palestine.”

Coldplay, who posted the music video for the “Freedom for Palestine” single on their Facebook page, took no part in the production but their Internet promotion nonetheless immediately caught the attention of major Jewish and Israeli media outlets…

Coldplay fan expressed predictably polar opinions of the band’s foray into politics. While some fans praised the band’s use of their fame to promote the Palestinian cause, others were decidedly disturbed by the move.

I’d be disturbed too. This tune is oddly upbeat given the subject matter, no? If you’re intent on cooking up musical propaganda for a people partially led by Hamas, you should either be thinking ballad or something really, really aggressive. This isn’t “push the Jews into the sea” music; this sounds like the anthem for the next World Cup or something. They should have gotten Coldplay to do it, in fact. Imagine melancholy ol’ Chris Martin plonking those keys, caterwauling for the right of return. Even Bibi wouldn’t be able to hold back the tears. Something for the next album, maybe.